A donut emergency, a lower-back tattoo identity crisis, and the possibility of cloning your hair before it abandons you. Science is moving forward. Humanity? Debatable.
Welcome back to The Rizzuto Show, the funny podcast where St. Louis news, rock music, weird science, questionable fashion choices, and an alarming amount of food talk somehow become a perfectly normal morning.
Rizz, Moon, Lern, Rafe, and special guest Devon are back with another round of daily comedy and sarcastic commentary, and this time we're tackling the important issues: Can you freeze your hair for future use? Is a tramp stamp still a tramp stamp if Gen Z calls it a cake topper? And how are we supposed to maintain a healthy diet when St. Louis keeps producing incredible donuts?
First, the crew gets ready for Greek Fire's upcoming show at Delmar Hall, where Moon promises at least three new songs. Rizz has already heard some of the music, Lern wants to experience it live, and Rafe suggests the new material might sound suspiciously like André 3000's flute album. Moon assures everyone there will be no flute. Apparently, the oboe-and-tuba market remains wide open.
That launches a trip through rock history as Rizz remembers footage of Dave Mustaine wandering onto the stage during a Guns N' Roses performance. The gang debates Megadeth versus Metallica, the unforgettable artwork of Vic Rattlehead and Iron Maiden's Eddie, and whether some music fans treat choosing a favorite metal band like declaring allegiance in an international conflict.
Then it's time for weird news, beginning with a mysterious vandal spray-painting religious messages around Blue Springs, Missouri. The gang agrees that having a message doesn't give you permission to redecorate somebody else's building.
But that's nothing compared to Lern's latest update from the Rizz Show Apocalypse Desk.
Apparently, another predicted date for the Rapture has come and gone, and Lern forgot to warn everybody until afterward. The crew debates doomsday predictions, followers who reportedly made drastic financial decisions, and what the end of the world would actually look like. Would people float into the sky? Disappear instantly? Deflate like balloons?
These are the theological questions that can only be answered by a room full of radio personalities who were supposed to be discussing the news.
Back in St. Louis, the mood turns serious when the gang discusses a fire at Old Town Donuts in Florissant. Thankfully, the report says nobody was injured, but the beloved local donut shop has the crew thinking about favorite pastries, simple glazed classics, long johns, and the sacred art of eating a grocery-store donut before you reach your car.
Unfortunately, Moon has recently eliminated added sugar from his diet, which means every conversation about donuts is now an act of psychological warfare. Rizz has also been cutting carbs and says he's down 15 pounds, but his strategy includes watching elaborate pasta and cheese videos with the concentration of a man studying for the bar exam.
Lern catches him in the act.
Rizz insists watching food videos helps him resist temptation. Nobody else is particularly convinced.
The food obsession continues when the gang celebrates Three Kings Public House at St. Louis Lambert International Airport being recognized in a USA Today readers' poll for best airport bar. From there, it's a tour of surprisingly good gas-station cuisine, including QuikTrip, Casey's, Wawa, Sheetz, barbecue, fried chicken, and unexpected international food finds around the St. Louis area.
Moon and Rafe also share the glorious spectacle of watching intoxicated customers attempt to order food at a Wawa after the bars close. Sometimes the biggest challenge isn't choosing a sandwich. It's remembering your own name when the employee calls it.
Then comes the cultural debate nobody knew we needed.
Gen Z wants to rebrand the tramp stamp.
The suggested replacement? Cake topper.
Other contenders include bumper sticker and booty mark, because apparently the English language needed more ways to describe a tattoo directly above somebody's rear end.
Lern proudly admits she got her lower-back tattoo almost immediately after turning 18, then shares how her younger sister accidentally exposed the secret to her family. Moon reveals that he also has a tramp stamp, except his came from a questionable tattoo shop next to a former North County adult establishment, and the experience has not aged particularly well.
The crew debates tattoo regrets, changing slang, generational differences, and why a new name doesn't necessarily make a terrible decision any better.
Next, couples are apparently taking up pole dancing together as a workout, a bonding activity, and even an alternative to the traditional wedding dance. Lern and Moon appreciate the athleticism and strength involved, while Rizz struggles to imagine himself gracefully spinning around anything.
Rafe recalls performing stand-up at an event where aerial performers, contortionists, paintings, and a man wearing goat horns while playing a pan flute were all competing for attention. It's hard to win over a comedy crowd when the circus is literally happening above your head.
And finally, this funny podcast dives headfirst into the future of baldness.
Scientists are exploring experimental hair banking and hair cloning, which could someday allow people to preserve hair follicles and potentially grow new hair from them. The process isn't FDA-approved, and the technology still has major limitations, but that doesn't stop the gang from imagining a future where you can order somebody else's luxurious surfer hair like a custom accessory.
Moon wonders whether he could borrow another man's hair. Lern considers the possibilities for beards. Rafe, naturally, finds a way to make the conversation considerably less sophisticated.
The gang also discusses hair-loss genetics, family baldness, hair transplants, and why the lengths people go to preserve a hairline can get pretty intense.
Plus, the crew explores trending Halloween costumes, because nothing says spooky season like trying to explain an internet-reference costume to someone who has absolutely no idea who you're supposed to be.
From Old Town Donuts and St. Louis food favorites to hair cloning, tattoo regrets, metal legends, doomsday predictions, and couples pole dancing, Episode 88 delivers the weird news, funny stories, and pop culture chaos that make The Rizzuto Show a daily St. Louis tradition.
This funny podcast has everything: donuts you can't eat, hair you can't clone yet, tattoos you can't undo, and an apocalypse that apparently forgot to show up.
At least the radio show was on time. Mostly.
Follow The Rizzuto Show → linktr.ee/rizzshow for more from your favorite daily comedy show.
Connect with The Rizzuto Show Comedy Podcast online → 1057thepoint.com/RizzShow.
Hear The Rizz Show daily on the radio at 105.7 The Point | Hubbard Radio in St. Louis, MO.
See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
