Mark's sponsor could take almost any complaint back to a page in the Big Book. But the daily work of AA's Steps Ten, Eleven, and Twelve was still Mark's responsibility, including the meditation he skipped for his first ten years sober.
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Mark gives October 19, 1982, as the beginning of his sobriety, but says it took years to understand powerlessness and begin waking up to the spiritual life described in the Big Book. In this Monday morning spiritual talk, he concentrates on Steps Ten, Eleven, and Twelve, drawing on his experiences in AA and CA. He remembers a sponsor who answered complaints with two questions: had he prayed, and did he have his Big Book handy? That sponsor also challenged him after a fifteen-minute share in a room of thirty people, asking whether taking so much of the meeting was another expression of selfishness. Mark connects that accountability with learning to take responsibility for his own recovery and to distinguish spiritual experience from opinions about things he has never practiced. His approach to Step Ten centers on watching for selfishness, dishonesty, resentment, and fear, asking for their removal, and turning toward someone he can help. He describes spending six months working with the single word "watch" and learning to notice thoughts and feelings without being completely carried away by them. His sign reading "whatever" above an altar becomes a humorous reminder of the promise of ceasing to fight. Step Eleven brings a practice he says he neglected for his first ten years sober: meditation. He describes sitting twice a day for twenty-four minutes, alongside morning preparation, attention throughout the day, and an evening review. In discussing Step Twelve, Mark explains how he talks honestly with a newcomer about willingness, inventory, amends, and the daily work ahead before they begin studying the book together. His aim is to help that person become independent of him and develop a spiritual life of their own. Throughout this direct, God-centered recovery talk, he returns to the difference between hearing about the program and living it, then asks listeners to carry that experience back into their meetings, work, homes, and service to others.
Mark H. from Dallas, TX - Monday Morning Spiritual Speaker
Music: Deep by KaizanBlu
