Have you ever done something that went against everything you believe about yourself? Maybe you think of yourself as an honest person, but you round up hours on your timesheet. Or maybe you say family is the most important thing in your life, but you spend the entire weekend working. Or maybe it's something bigger — something you still can't fully explain, even though it happened years ago.
Most of us assume that when we act against our values, it's because we're weak. But there's evidence that shows even mentally strong people might sometimes lie, cheat or break their own rules.
My guest is Dr. Glenn Hutchinson, a psychologist who has spent years studying why people's behavior isn't always in line with their values.
Some of the things we discuss are:
Why the explanations we come up with for our own behavior are often completely wrong (and the famous 1977 study that proved it)
Why we judge other people more harshly than we judge ourselves for the exact same behavior
Why willpower fails almost everyone eventually
What the new GLP-1 medications reveal about how unconscious urges actually work
Why happily married people can still be unfaithful and the ancient brain systems that operate independently of our values
The dangerous "I've already blown it" thinking that turns one small slip into a full-blown spiral
The story of the man who left an inpatient facility convinced he was a narcissist when he wasn't even close
The chilling examples of how our conscious mind fails us
Why insight and behavior change are two completely different things
The two questions to ask about any bad habit
The Therapist's Take: My top three strategies for getting your behavior in line with your values
Related Episodes
132 — Understand Your Habits by Uncovering the Emotional Thread That Drives Your Behavior
49 — 7 Boundary Mistakes That Damage Relationships
Links & Resources
Unfaithful Minds
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