Would you skip work to play golf with Ozzie Smith? Tim McKernan sure would. And honestly, that's probably the most reasonable decision anyone makes in this entire episode.
Rizz, Moon Valjean, Lern, and Rafe Williams are back with another funny podcast packed with baseball legends, celebrity gossip, backstage rock stories, St. Louis news, and the kind of entertainment chaos that makes you wonder how these people have maintained careers in broadcasting.
First, Tim McKernan bails on recording The Spreads podcast for a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to golf with Cardinals legend Ozzie Smith. Can you blame him? Lern admits to making a similar decision for a chance to meet Don Mattingly, and the gang gets into childhood sports heroes, Will Clark's hilariously unfiltered baseball stories, and whether meeting your idols is worth abandoning your coworkers.
Then Crap on Celebrities takes a spectacular turn.
The crew discusses rumors about Jay-Z potentially headlining the Super Bowl halftime show, whether Beyoncé might join him, and why rock fans shouldn't hold their breath waiting for a guitar-heavy halftime performance. There's also a detour into Rick Rubin's mysterious wizard-like appearance, because apparently legendary music producers are now required to look like they live in Middle-earth.
Moon shares his experience recently performing before The Offspring, including spending time around guitarist Noodles before news of his temporary break from live performances. The gang also covers Sully Erna's clarification about Godsmack's future and the possibility of more new music.
But the real backstage madness begins when Moon tells an unforgettable story about playing a festival headlined by 50 Cent.
After Coheed and Cambria's set gets cut short to accommodate the headliner, everyone waits for 50 Cent to take the stage. And waits. And waits some more. Meanwhile, there's a line of women outside his tour bus, and the rapper apparently has absolutely no interest in rushing.
Nearly an hour late, he finally emerges, performs a relatively short set, and heads right back to the bus.
Rock-star behavior? Absolutely. Professional scheduling? Not even remotely.
Rafe follows that up with a story about DJ Khaled turning a golf outing into a full-blown video production, allegedly having someone record every swing and delete the bad shots. Imagine being stuck behind a golfer who needs a social media editor before he can hit his next ball. Another one? Unfortunately, yes.
The celebrity news continues with 50 Cent's ongoing feud with Rick Ross, discussions of country music, and a tribute to John Anderson as the crew revisits his biggest songs and debates the greatest albums of all time.
Back in St. Louis, the gang discusses a proposed reality television series involving the St. Louis Metropolitan Police Department, including Mayor Cara Spencer's opposition and whether putting local policing on national television would help the city or create even more problems. Naturally, this leads to memories of Cops, bizarre sovereign-citizen arrest videos, and the endless entertainment value of people arguing with police about laws they clearly don't understand.
Hollywood gets its turn, too, with talk of a possible Coach reboot starring Ty Burrell, Chris Pratt's future as Star-Lord, Kylie Jenner and Timothée Chalamet engagement rumors, and Josh Brolin's reflections on sobriety. There's even a brief moment when the crew mistakenly declares an actor dead before discovering he's very much alive. Fantastic work, everybody.
Plus, Nirvana's Nevermind sparks a debate about album sales, streaming numbers, and whether modern music statistics can really be compared with the days when people had to physically buy a record.
It's baseball nostalgia, celebrity feuds, rock-and-roll memories, weird Hollywood news, and sarcastic humor from a St. Louis morning show that somehow manages to turn a golf invitation into a discussion about 50 Cent's tour bus.
If you love funny stories, celebrity news, music history, pop culture commentary, and the wonderfully unpredictable conversations that make The Rizzuto Show what it is, this funny podcast has plenty to keep you entertained.
Join Rizz and the gang for another funny podcast where Tim McKernan chooses Ozzie Smith over work, DJ Khaled can't hit a golf ball without a production crew, and 50 Cent apparently operates on his own time zone.
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