013: The Emotional Transformation of Motherhood: A Mum's Story of Matrescence, Mental Load, and Finding Her Village

Motherhood doesn’t mean “bouncing back” to who you were before. It can reshape your identity, values, relationships, career, and sense of self - yet many women enter pregnancy with almost no preparation for the emotional transformation ahead. Zana and her guest explore what happens when motherhood collides with emotionally demanding work, invisible mental load, and the pressure to support everyone else. The guest shares her experience as a child protection lawyer and mother, including the compassion fatigue that followed her home, the impact on her relationship, and why running and connection with other women became essential forms of support.You’ll hear about:

• Why compassion fatigue can affect your home life even when you remain compassionate and effective at work
• What pregnant women should be told about matrescence, identity change, and the feeling of becoming a different person
• Why hospital classes and pamphlets often miss the emotional realities of birth, breastfeeding, and early motherhood
• How moving towns can mean rebuilding your village from scratch
• Why support needs to begin during pregnancy and continue well beyond the first six months postpartum
• The practical challenge of receiving help when you are not someone who naturally asks for it

The guest also reflects on preparing for the possibility of going from one child to two, the unexpected ways motherhood can change long-term goals, and the importance of accepting that the journey will keep shifting. Her river metaphor offers a powerful reminder: motherhood has rapids and smoother waters, but trying to fight the current only makes the journey harder. For every mother who has felt emotionally depleted, isolated, guilty, or surprised by how much motherhood changed her, this conversation offers recognition and reassurance. You are not failing. You are navigating a profound transition, and you were never meant to do it alone

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