You want your partner. You’re attracted to them. So why does initiating sex feel like a task you can’t start?
Natassia sits down with clinical sexologist, licensed psychotherapist, and ADHD sex and relationship researcher Dr. Leann Borneman, LCSW, CST, to unpack ADHD, executive function, desire, initiation, sensory sensitivity, perimenopause, responsive desire, kink, and what she calls “erotic accommodations.”
Misdiagnosed as bipolar as a kid and only diagnosed with ADHD as an adult through her daughter’s evaluation, Leann went on to produce the first doctoral research on ADHD and BDSM in heterosexual women, and she speaks here as both a clinician and a woman living it.
They explore why sex and desire need executive function to access, why so much standard desire advice falls flat for ADHD brains, and why Leann has a love-hate relationship with scheduling sex. This conversation reframes distraction, delays, and “sex paralysis” as barriers you can map, not proof that something is wrong with you.
Whether you have ADHD, love someone who does, or have ever felt your desire disappear somewhere between wanting and doing, this episode will give you language you didn’t know you were missing.
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Lust in Translation Podcast
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Work with Leann: https://www.bornemancoaching.com/
Follow Leann on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drb_unfiltered/
Listen to her podcast, ADHD Realities: https://www.youtube.com/@ADHDRealities
Read her Substack: https://drleannborneman.substack.com/
