You did no contact the way you were told to. Blocked, unfollowed, no drive-bys, no "just checking." Six months of it. And the obsession never got the memo. You wake up with them, you fall asleep with them, and in between you're carrying on a conversation they aren't part of — rehearsing what you should have said, imagining what they'd say back, wondering if they're thinking about you too.
This episode is an answer to a listener who wrote in with exactly that: she did everything right and she's still stuck. And the answer isn't that she's doing it wrong, or that something in her is broken in a way no contact can't fix. It's that limerence runs on uncertainty — and when the person stops supplying it, your mind is perfectly capable of manufacturing it on its own. Every "maybe if I'd said this," every "maybe they'll come back," is a fresh top-up of fuel you're producing yourself. Which means no contact removed the person, but the person had stopped being the source a long time ago.
We talk about what you're actually in a relationship with now, why it's so hard to put down (it's a kind of self-comfort, and it works), what it quietly costs you, and the one thing that lets it finally settle — not white-knuckling, not starving yourself of comfort, but getting the real version of what the fantasy has been giving you.
Free resources, quizzes, and the Calm-Down Toolkit: https://www.youreclaimedproject.com
Submit a question for a future episode: https://youreclaimedproject.com/ask/
Disclaimer: I'm not a therapist or medical professional. The information in this podcast is for educational purposes only and is based on personal experience and research. It isn't a substitute for therapy, medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. If you're considering therapeutic techniques discussed here, I recommend exploring them with a licensed mental health professional. If you're in crisis or need immediate support, contact local emergency services or a licensed provider in your area.
