When you grow up with a narcissistic parent or a parent with unmanaged borderline personality disorder, apologies often function as a way to end the conversation, avoid accountability, or label you as the problem.
And like many aspects of these types of family dynamics, apologies can be confusing and leave you replaying the conversation, wondering if you're being unreasonable by not fully accepting them.
In this episode you'll learn:
- What a healthy apology actually looks like
- Why "I'm sorry" can be a completely reasonable apology in one relationship and feel hollow in another
- The reason your gut flags an apology as insincere, and what your brain is actually tracking
- How the gap between what you experienced and what you're told to feel about it erodes self-trust over time
- Why not accepting an apology, or accepting it cautiously, can be a reasonable response
Ready to go deeper?
Stop Getting Pulled Back Into the Chaos is Torie's self-guided course on how to set and enforce boundaries with a parent who has borderline or narcissistic traits. It covers why your boundaries keep failing, what to do instead, and how to keep going when your parent pushes back.
Learn more and get started: confidentboundaries.com/course
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Need help getting ready for your next interaction with a difficult parent? Check out, Surviving Interactions With a Narcissistic, Emotionally Immature, or Otherwise Toxic Parent.
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Disclaimer: This podcast is not therapy. If you’re in crisis, please call the 988 Crisis Lifeline.
You're Not Crazy is owned and produced by Torie Wiksell and Confident Boundaries, LLC.