#157: On today’s episode, Han sits down with Isaac Hindin-Miller, a fashion journalist turned DJ, interviewer, content creator, and founder of I LIKE YOU!, for an honest conversation about external validation, low self-worth, negative self-talk, and the lifelong work of learning how to feel whole within yourself.
Isaac and Han unpack the realization that no amount of attention, achievement, access, popularity, or external approval can fill an internal void. They discuss what it actually takes to rebuild your self-esteem, interrupt destructive thought patterns, stop outsourcing your worth, and choose peace and acceptance instead of constantly chasing happiness. They get into:
- Why external approval can never create lasting self-worth
- Why happiness cannot be contingent on external validation
- Choosing acceptance and peace instead of chasing constant happiness
- Navigating imposter syndrome and self doubt
- How to interrupt cruel and destructive negative self-talk
- The problem with finding validation elsewhere
- Depression, sobriety, and breaking cycles of self-destructive behavior
- The connection between low self-esteem and unhealthy coping mechanisms
- Social media, comparison, and attaching your value to your work
- Intellectualizing trauma instead of allowing yourself to feel it
- Why understanding your emotions is different from actually feeling them
- How choosing a different behavior can lead to a healthier mindset
- Finding identity, hobbies, and joy outside of your career
- How relationships act as mirrors for the parts of ourselves that still need healing
& MORE!
This episode is for anyone who has ever looked outside of themselves for proof that they are worthy, lovable, important, or enough. This is a conversation for those doing the daily work to quiet the voices that tear you down, and learning to build a sense of self-worth that does not depend on attention, accomplishments, or validation.
TIMESTAMPS:
00:57 Isaac joins the podcast
04:25 Is the life he dreamed about everything he thought it would be?
05:21 Why reaching the top does not fill the internal void
05:40 The daily work required to feel whole
06:02 Accepting the human condition
06:13 Finding peace within the mundanity of life
06:26 Chasing happiness versus choosing acceptance
06:44 Redefining happiness as peace
07:06 Why happiness cannot be contingent on something happening
07:42 Isaac’s drive to reach the top
08:37 Experiencing bullying and rejection growing up
09:56 Building your self-worth on a foundation of sand
16:02 Growing the I LIKE YOU! parties from 800 to 3,000 people in New York City
16:33 Imposter syndrome, self-doubt, and feeling like a fraud
16:57 Feeling isolated while surrounded by crowds
17:05 The conversation with Isaac’s dad that changed his perspective
17:46 Becoming a victim to your own story
18:07 The danger of constantly thinking about yourself
18:20 Learning to interrupt negative self-talk
19:35 Accepting that the negative voices may never fully disappear
19:59 Moving toward something positive or negative
20:14 Depression and self-destructive coping mechanisms
21:20 Rebuilding self-esteem from within
21:32 The connection between mental health and low self-worth
22:47 Social media, validation, and mental health
23:55 Attaching your personal value to your business
24:42 Sobriety and learning how to feel
27:12 Intellectualizing emotions and suppressing vulnerability
27:52 Understanding yourself versus feeling your emotions
28:28 Changing your behavior to change your mindset
33:51 The importance in finding a hobby
34:53 Having the courage to redefine who you are
48:18 How relationships act as mirrors
CONNECT BELOW:
Follow Isaac here
Follow I Like You here
Read Isaac's Substack here
CONNECT with HAN:
Follow Han here
Follow HOW I SEE IT here
Follow Han on Substack here
Watch HOW I SEE IT on YouTube here
Shop the podcast merch here
Work with Han: howhanseesit@gmail.com
