Covid changed the relationship between employees, offices and commuting, particularly in cities such as Tokyo. For many people, working from home eliminated hours spent standing in packed trains every day. That time could suddenly be spent sleeping, exercising, enjoying hobbies, being with the family or simply getting more work done.
The bigger leadership question is what happens when working from home stops being an emergency response and becomes a permanent part of working life.
Hybrid work brings obvious benefits, but it also removes many of the informal interactions leaders once took for granted. That means leaders need to deliberately create opportunities to spend real, face-to-face time with their people.
One surprisingly powerful answer may be very simple: have more meals with the team.
Why do leaders need more face-to-face time in a hybrid workplace?
Hybrid and remote work reduce the spontaneous personal interactions through which leaders often discover what is really happening with their people. Zoom, Teams and other online meetings are excellent for conducting business, but not every workplace issue fits comfortably into a scheduled video call.
When everyone worked in the office, leaders had numerous opportunities to notice things. A brief corridor conversation, a chat after a meeting or a spontaneous discussion could reveal concerns that would never warrant someone scheduling a formal meeting with the boss.
Hybrid work removes many of those moments.
That matters because employees may be dealing with difficult clients, strained relationships with colleagues, concerns about their boss or other sensitive workplace issues. If there isn't an easy opportunity to raise them, people may simply keep quiet and let the problem fester.
Do now: Don't assume that because nobody is raising problems on Zoom, there aren't any problems. Deliberately create opportunities for private face-to-face conversations.
Why can sharing a meal improve communication between leaders and employees?
A meal creates a more relaxed environment than a formal meeting and can make difficult conversations easier to begin. Lunch or dinner changes the atmosphere and gives the leader and employee time together without a computer screen dominating the interaction.
The objective isn't fine dining. The important ingredient is communication.
This is especially valuable when discussing tender subjects such as difficult customers, problems with colleagues or frustrations inside the organisation. Sitting opposite the boss in a meeting room and being expected to explain a sensitive issue can feel intimidating.
A restaurant creates a different dynamic. The conversation can move naturally between work and other topics. Silence doesn't have to be immediately filled. The employee has time to decide whether there is something they want to discuss.
The leader also gets something increasingly scarce in the hybrid workplace: uninterrupted one-to-one time.
Do now: Use occasional lunches and dinners as leadership opportunities rather than treating every employee conversation as another formal meeting.
Why don't important employee issues always surface on Zoom?
Employees naturally filter what they discuss in formal online meetings, so leaders can mistakenly believe they know more about what is happening inside their organisation than they actually do.
This is one of the troubling things about those chance encounters when someone suddenly tells you what has really been going on.
You find yourself thinking, "I wonder what else I am not across, which I need to know about?"
Online meetings generally have an agenda and a purpose. Everyone knows why they are there. Sensitive issues don't necessarily fit neatly between agenda items.
There is also a psychological difference between clicking "Join Meeting" for a scheduled discussion with the boss and gradually raising an issue during a relaxed conversation over lunch.
Leaders therefore need to think preventatively rather than reactively.
Don't wait until the employee requests the meeting because the situation has become unbearable.
Do now: Ask yourself what information your current communication system is unlikely to uncover, rather than assuming scheduled meetings are telling you everything.
How often should leaders have meals with their team members?
Meals with employees work best when they become a regular leadership cadence rather than occasional events triggered by problems. The objective is to systemise informal communication before issues become serious.
Birthdays can provide one opportunity. Taking someone to lunch on their birthday is a nice recognition element within the team culture and creates natural one-to-one time.
But once a year isn't enough.
Leaders should consider regularly rotating through their direct reports. There may also be important people outside the direct reporting line who would benefit from occasional one-to-one time.
This doesn't need to become an expensive corporate entertainment programme. You have to eat lunch anyway. The restaurant doesn't need Michelin stars, and the meeting doesn't necessarily need to take place near the office.
In a hybrid environment, a mutually convenient location may actually be easier for both people.
Do now: Create a simple rotation so every direct report receives regular informal face-to-face time rather than waiting for chance encounters.
How can leaders make employee lunches psychologically safe?
The lunch must feel like a genuine conversation, not an interrogation disguised by food. Leaders need to create an atmosphere where employees feel they can speak openly if they want to, without feeling pressured to reveal something.
Sometimes nothing magical will emerge.
That doesn't mean the lunch was wasted. Simply spending relaxed time together can strengthen trust, and trust may make a future conversation possible.
I once spent an hour sitting in silence in a small meeting room with a female employee in her early twenties. She was experiencing a problem involving her boss, who was more than 50 years old.
Eventually she told me, "I can't tell you the problem."
That was that.
I still don't know what the issue was. But I have often wondered whether getting out of the office and talking over a meal might have made it easier for her to open up.
Do now: Don't measure the success of the meal by how much information you extract. Measure it by whether you are strengthening the relationship and building trust.
Can regular face-to-face contact help leaders retain employees?
Strong personal relationships with leaders can become increasingly important for retention when talented employees have plenty of alternative employment opportunities. Recruiters are actively looking for people who might be persuaded to leave their current employer.
If the leader has little personal contact with team members, problems can grow unnoticed.
By the time the leader discovers the employee is unhappy, a recruiter may already be having the conversations the leader should have been having.
That doesn't mean lunch is some magical retention technique. Employees leave organisations for many reasons, including compensation, career development, management quality and better opportunities.
But regular personal contact gives leaders a better chance of understanding what is happening before the resignation letter arrives.
There is a simple competitive reality here. Someone may be prepared to spend time building a relationship with your best people.
It would be smart if that someone were you.
Do now: Treat regular personal contact as part of leadership and retention, rather than waiting for the annual engagement survey to discover how people feel.
Leadership in the Hybrid Workplace Requires Deliberate Human Contact
Hybrid work has changed many of the assumptions leaders previously made about communication.
When everyone was in the office, relationships could develop through dozens of small interactions. Leaders could observe behaviour, have spontaneous conversations and notice when something didn't seem right.
Those opportunities are much less reliable when people are working remotely.
Leaders therefore need to deliberately recreate some of the human contact that disappeared when the workforce left the office.
That doesn't mean dragging everyone back into the building five days a week just so the boss can see them.
It means finding intelligent ways to create meaningful face-to-face contact.
A regular lunch with direct reports is hardly a revolutionary management technology. It is simple, inexpensive and easy to organise.
The critical point is the purpose behind it.
Don't interrogate people. Don't turn lunch into another performance review. Don't arrive with a checklist of questions and start taking notes between courses.
Have a conversation.
Listen.
Build trust.
Give people the space to tell you what is happening — including the things they would never raise on Zoom.
In a hybrid workplace, your employees are going to have lunch with someone.
Better that it is occasionally you rather than the recruiter trying to lift them out of your shop.
Author Bio
Dr. Greg Story, Ph.D. in Japanese Decision-Making, is President of Dale Carnegie Tokyo Training and Adjunct Professor at Griffith University. He is a two-time winner of the Dale Carnegie "One Carnegie Award" (2018, 2021) and recipient of the Griffith University Business School Outstanding Alumnus Award (2012). As a Dale Carnegie Master Trainer, Greg is certified to deliver globally across leadership, communication, sales and presentation programmes, including Leadership Training for Results.
He has written several books, including three best-sellers — Japan Business Mastery, Japan Sales Mastery, and Japan Presentations Mastery — along with Japan Leadership Mastery and How to Stop Wasting Money on Training. His works have been translated into Japanese, including Za Eigyō (ザ営業), Purezen no Tatsujin (プレゼンの達人), Torēningu de Okane o Muda ni Suru no wa Yamemashō (トレーニングでお金を無駄にするのはやめましょう), and Gendaiban "Hito o Ugokasu" Rīdā (現代版「人を動かす」リーダー).
Greg also publishes daily business insights on LinkedIn, Facebook and Twitter, and hosts six weekly podcasts. On YouTube, he produces The Cutting Edge Japan Business Show, Japan Business Mastery, and Japan's Top Business Interviews, which are widely followed by executives seeking success strategies in Japan.
