Divorce Grief and Shame: How to Move Through the Pain with Kim Polinder

Divorce brings up two of the hardest emotions to talk about: grief and shame. Grief for the life you thought you'd have, the future you planned together, and the identity you're losing. And shame because even though divorce is common, there's still a stigma attached to it that can make you feel like you've failed.

In today's episode, I'm sitting down with Kim Polinder, associate therapist and author of Why We Fight(HarperOne), for an honest conversation about how to actually process these difficult emotions instead of rushing past them or burying them in a new relationship.

What we cover:

• Why grief is normal even in amicable divorces and how it can surface unexpectedly
• The shame that surrounds divorce and how to recognize patterns that have played out in other areas of your life
• How to process grief with supportive people rather than in isolation
• Creating rituals for closure including writing letters or revisiting meaningful places
• Why rushing into new relationships without grieving leads to repeating patterns
• Understanding your deepest triggers and what you're seeking from relationships
• The importance of introspection before entering your next relationship
• How to prevent second divorces by breaking cycles and clarifying your values
• Moving through pain with self-compassion instead of judgment

Whether you're in the middle of divorce, recently separated, or healing on the other side, this conversation offers compassionate guidance to help you process grief and shame so you can move forward with greater self-awareness and emotional health.

Want more resources? Check out myblog, grab my free "24 Questions to Ask A Divorce Attorney" guide, or sign up for my free 4-Email Divorce Prep Series for a step-by-step roadmap before you meet with an attorney. 

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The Divorce Planner podcast is for educational purposes only and does not constitute legal or financial advice. Consult qualified professionals about your situation.

Podcast Original Music, Editing, and Mixing by: Benjamin Robinson