Unmasking is rarely a straight path—and returning to old coping strategies does not mean you have failed. In this episode, Dr. Allison Sucamele explores unmasking as a spiral, weaving together a four-part unmasking process with Kübler-Ross’s five stages of grief. From identity and authenticity to safety, loss, and self-acceptance, this episode offers a compassionate look at why moving “backwards” may actually mean returning with greater awareness, agency, and understanding.
References
Å. Hedlund and colleagues, “Reclaiming selfhood: towards a conceptualisation of the autistic unmasking process,” Frontiers in Psychiatry (2026). Neurodivergent-led qualitative study describing four interconnected, circular categories: identifying the need to unmask, understanding one’s masking, using unmasking strategies, and managing consequences.
L. Hull and colleagues, “Putting on My Best Normal: Social Camouflaging in Adults with Autism Spectrum Conditions,” Journal of Autism and Developmental Disorders (2017).
E. Cage and colleagues, “Understanding the Reasons, Contexts and Costs of Camouflaging for Autistic Adults,” Journal of Autism and Developmental Disorders (2019).
J. Cook and colleagues, “Camouflaging in autism: A systematic review,” Clinical Psychology Review (2021).
L. Bradley and colleagues, “Autistic Adults’ Experiences of Camouflaging and Its Perceived Impact on Mental Health,” Autism in Adulthood (2021/2022).
K. Corden and colleagues, “Personal Identity After an Autism Diagnosis: Relationships With Self-Esteem, Mental Wellbeing, and Diagnostic Timing,” Frontiers in Psychology (2021).
S. Bargiela and colleagues, “The Experiences of Late-diagnosed Women with Autism Spectrum Conditions: An Investigation of the Female Autism Phenotype,” Journal of Autism and Developmental Disorders (2016).
Elisabeth Kübler-Ross, On Death and Dying (1969). The five responses originated in work with people facing terminal illness and should not be treated as a universal or linear bereavement sequence.
Elisabeth Kübler-Ross Foundation, overview of the five stages/change curve.
Crisis and Support
If this discussion brings up feelings of hopelessness or thoughts of self-harm, please reach out for immediate support. In the United States and its territories, call or text 988 to reach the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline. If you are elsewhere, contact your local crisis service or emergency number.
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