S2 Episode 15: It’s Not Miscommunication — It’s Mismatched Wiring
Many couples believe their struggles come down to poor communication. But in neurodiverse relationships, the issue is often deeper than that.
In this episode, Blaze explores why “miscommunication” may not fully explain what’s happening between partners. Instead, she introduces the concept of mismatched wiring—where both individuals are communicating clearly, but interpreting each other through different internal frameworks.
Drawing on the Double Empathy Problem (Damian Milton), this episode highlights how misunderstanding can occur even when both partners are trying, caring, and showing up. Through a detailed couple example, listeners are guided to see how emotional needs, processing styles, and expectations can differ without either partner being at fault.
Rather than focusing on fixing communication, this episode invites couples to slow down, clarify what is actually being asked for, and begin building understanding from the ground up.
One Emotional Takeaway
You’re not failing to communicate—you’re starting from different places.
Companion Blog
Autism and Neurotypical Relationships: Building Understanding
Substack Reflection
“You’re Both Speaking Clearly — In Different Languages”
Book a Clarity & Connection Zoom Session
https://www.loveontheautismspectrum.com
🎧 Listen On
Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Amazon or HERE: https://www.loveontheautismspectrum.com/podcast/
#NeurodiverseRelationships
#CommunicationDifferences
#DoubleEmpathy
#AutismAndRelationships
#RelationalUnderstanding
#LoveOnTheAutismSpectrum
🔗 LINKS & RESOURCES
Start here — the free guide that gently names the pattern: ✨ You're Not Too Much. You're Just Alone in the Repair. → link.blazelazarony.com/youre-not-too-much
Explore more tools, relationship guidance, and weekly blog posts at: 🌐 www.LoveOnTheAutismSpectrum.com
Catch up on more episodes: 🎧 loveontheautismspectrum.com/podcast
Read deeper reflections and behind-the-scenes writing on Substack: ✉️ blazelazarony.substack.com
For behind-the-scenes reflections and bonus content, follow along on Instagram: 📸 @BlazeLazarony
The book — daily reflections for coming home to who you really are: 📚 Unmasked Self-Acceptance → author.amazon.com/home
When you're ready to talk — a free, no-pressure Clarity & Connection Zoom: 🗓 link.blazelazarony.com/Book-C-and-C-Zoom
This podcast is for educational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional mental health care. Listening does not create a therapeutic relationship or provide individualized advice.
Barbara (Blaze) Lazarony, MA, LMFT #151788, is licensed in California. All examples are fictional and used for illustration only.
If you're experiencing a mental health crisis, please call 988 or contact local emergency services.
