#133 The Psychology of Mismatched Desire: The Kink Consultant Amanda Dames on Sex & Relationships

What happens when you love each other — but you don't want the same things sexually?

In this episode I'm joined by Amanda Dames, The Kink Consultant, to explore the psychology of mismatched desire, sexual compatibility and kink in relationships.

We explore:

• What mismatched sexual desire looks like inside relationships.
• Why telling our partner what we really want can feel extraordinarily vulnerable.
• Whether an apparent “low desire” partner might simply not be having the kind of sex that activates their desire.
• What BDSM and kink can teach conventional couples about negotiating desire, boundaries and consent.
• The surprisingly complicated question: is sex actually a need?

Research article: Strategies for Mitigating Sexual Desire Discrepancy in Relationships

This episode is proudly sponsored by Stigma Health.

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Visit ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠psychologyofdesire.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ to support the podcast, or apply to be a guest. I'd love to chat to you.

Thanks for listening!

Stay perverted,

Emma

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