Real Influence Never Comes From a Pitch: Jay Jacobson on 20 Years as a Funeral Director, and What Letting Go of Control Actually Costs

For more than twenty years, Jay Jacobson had a job where you simply cannot pitch. Nobody walks into a funeral home to be sold to. All you can do is slow the moment down, be genuinely present, and let the way you serve speak for itself.

That turns out to be the whole thing.

Jay is a funeral director, business owner, speaker, and the author of Lead by Legendary Example — recently named a finalist for the International Impact Award for Business. He came on to talk about influence that has nothing to do with persuasion, and it took us somewhere deeper than either of us planned.

What we get into:

• Why the funeral home is the best classroom there is for anyone who freezes at selling
• The difference between giving people what they want and what they actually need — without ever pushing
• Jay's wife Shelly, a routine surgery that became twelve, and the eighteen months that taught him what control really costs
• Why "control looks strong but it's fragile, and collaboration looks vulnerable but carries you through"
• The three-minute rule: how trust is really built, and why it's mostly listening
• Testifying before the US Senate at thirty-one — and what it taught him about knowing your mission so you can pivot without losing yourself
• "Be where your feet are" — presence as the rarest and most powerful skill left

Find Jay: Lead by Legendary Example and his work are at jacobsonprostaff.com.

Go deeper: my free guide Go Three Levels Deep → zenright.com.au/go-three-levels-deep