When does wellness become another way of trying to fix yourself?
In this episode, Ailey sits down with Amanda White, licensed professional counsellor and author of Not Drinking Tonight, to explore how the pursuit of wellness can quietly pull us further away from our bodies. Together, they question the promise that the right routine or enough self improvement will eventually create a version of ourselves who no longer struggles.
Amanda shares how her own recovery shaped the way she understands avoidance and our desire to escape uncomfortable experiences. The conversation considers what changes when we stop treating discomfort as evidence that something is wrong and begin developing the capacity to stay present with what we feel.
Ailey and Amanda also reflect on the difference between protecting ourselves and avoiding life. Rather than searching for the perfect boundary or healing practice, they explore a more flexible way of relating to ourselves that leaves room for uncertainty and the full range of being human.
If you have ever felt exhausted by the pressure to optimise yourself, this conversation offers another possibility: a life built around greater capacity rather than greater control.
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