If anyone has ever said that to you "You should not be wanting so much sex" - related to how often you want it, a fantasy, or a desire that turned up uninvited — this one is for you.
We go straight to the point today: shame is the cause of almost every problem in a relationship.
We discuss:
- how shame is something that we are not born with – but that is rather taught us – for good and, not so good, reasons
- how body shame is a boner/libido killer
- why you should trust your desires
- how stop giving a fuck about what people think creates space for curiosity, endless possibilities, and new levels of pleasures
If you’ve ever found yourself fighting with your partner about how much sex you’re (not) having – listen to this and go back to that conversation.
==
CHAPTERS
02:01 What is shame?
04:44 Shame is learned
07:09 What are you ashamed of?
10:46 Body image shame
12:40 Intimacy: the relationship with yourself, before anybody else
15:50 Stop giving a fuck and it will affect others
16:42 What happens on the other side of shame
18:15 Shame as an identity
19:17 Shame for kinks and fantasies
22:28 Trust your desires
24:58 Shame of craving intimacy with a partner
26:42 Ban the phrase "you should not want this" and you'll have a happier relationship
28:32 How knowing your values improves and deepens your relationship
29:43 Shame is a mechanism of control. Control comes from fear
==
Curious about this topic? Don't miss these other episodes:
» E4 | Don't Like The Way You Look? Reframing Body Shame Leads To Deeper Intimacy – Listen on Apple or Spotify
» E23 | What's Really Cockblocking Your Wildest Fantasies (And How To Stop That) – Listen on Apple or Spotify
» E24 | Why Suppressing Your Sexuality Is Counter Productive And How You Can Live Out Your Fantasies – Listen on Apple or Spotify
» E26 | Open Or Monogamous Relationship? Neither Lasts Without These 3 Pillars — With Eva Di Pierro – Listen on Apple or Spotify
==
FREE RESOURCES:
- Download our popular guide 10 Prompts For Deeper Conversations With Your Partner
- Meet your mother’s worst enemy at her next LIVE online workshop - free on zoom, with limited seats only
Chiara Hardie is an intimacy coach who shows you how to stop giving a damn about what anyone thinks.
She helps you find the confidence and freedom to express what you didn't dare tell your partner — and you stop performing to get love, intimacy and affection.
