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When someone with dementia calls repeatedly, it can leave caregivers exhausted, distracted, and afraid to put down the phone.
Even when the last several calls involved the same question, the next one could be an emergency. And when caregivers cannot answer, they may be left wondering whether their loved one feels frightened, confused, or abandoned.
In this episode of From Guilt to Good, Jeanette Yates speaks with Kirstin Thomas, co-founder and president of KindredMIND.
After a stroke significantly accelerated her mother’s cognitive decline, Kirstin began receiving as many as ten calls before lunch. She eventually realized that her mother was not calling to manipulate her or make her feel guilty. She was frightened and searching for the familiar voice of the person who made her feel safe.
Kirstin explains dementia separation anxiety, why reassurance may disappear almost immediately after a call, and why common responses such as voicemail, blocking calls, or saying “you just called me” may not address the emotion underneath the behavior.
She also shares the story behind KindredMIND, a voice companion designed to respond in a familiar version of the caregiver’s voice when the caregiver is physically unable to answer.
Jeanette and Kirstin discuss validation therapy, caregiver guilt, consent, AI ethics, privacy, and the difference between using technology to replace human connection and using it to protect that connection.
Most importantly, Kirstin explains how accepting support allowed her to stop showing up only as the person managing her mother’s life—and begin showing up as her daughter again.
Sponsor: Savi Security
A special thank you to our Sponsor, Savi Security. Learn more about how Savi protects your family from AI-powered scams across calls and texts, 24/7: https://www.savisecurity.com
Resources:
KindredMIND
Learn more and explore the 30-day free trial and get 10% off with code: YATES10
https://kindredmind.care/
The Self-Caregiver/Jeanette Yates
Caregiver resources and support from Jeanette Yates:
https://www.jeanetteyates.com/trusted-care-technology
Support the show
NOW AVAILABLE! From Guilt To Good Enough: A Caregiver’s Journey of Overcoming Burnout Through Healing Childhood by Jeanette Yates. Having been a caregiver for her mother since childhood, Jeanette knows firsthand the emotional toll caregiving can take. In this memoir-turned-self-help guide, she shares her journey of healing, setting boundaries, and reclaiming her life. Click here to purchase your copy!
At The Self-Caregiver LLC we guide women caring for their aging parents overcome burnout and release guilt to create more freedom and fulfillment in their life.
We believe you cannot give more of yourself until you heal the wounds, replenish your being and reconnect to the fullness of who you are, embracing the purpose you‘ve been called to live.
