Why has the person who claimed to love you gone years without once saying your name — not even once?
When a narcissist won't say your name, it isn't a quirk. It's name erasure: a slow, deliberate way of treating you as less than a full person.
In this Viewers' Stories episode, Dr. Kerry reads real survivor stories and unpacks four ways the same tactic shows up. Each one is a covert control tactic, and together they're a form of withholding affection most survivors don't recognize as emotional abuse until much later. You'll learn how to read what someone's use of your name reveals about how they actually see you, and why these small omissions add up to something far bigger than rudeness.
Key Moments
00:00:00 — The Husband Who Never Said Her Name
00:01:19 — When "Gorgeous" Was a Quiet Cruelty
00:03:11 — The Trap Hidden Inside "Babe" and "Honey"
00:04:08 — Hearing Your Name Until the Room Goes Foggy
00:05:09 — Mispronounced on Purpose, Again and Again
Kerry Kerr McAvoy, Ph.D, a retired psychologist & author, is an expert on cultivating healthy relationships and deconstructing narcissism.
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This podcast/video is for educational purposes only. It does not constitute therapy, counseling, or professional mental health advice. If you are in crisis, please call 911 or your local emergency number.
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