The moment someone says “I have no choice,” a coach has a doorway into what’s really happening beneath the words. We talk with leadership and executive coach Sanaz Kalantari about how agency gets lost in modern work, why the speed of change can push us into survival mode, and what it actually takes to design empowered conversations that bring choice back online.
Sanaz draws on deep experience from global technology organizations, including helping lead a large scale coaching initiative at Microsoft focused on empowering employees to drive and design their careers. From there, we zoom in on the coaching room: the “have to” trap, the subtle ways clients give away autonomy, and how overwhelm can look like indecision when it’s really a nervous system response. We explore three common patterns that shrink agency: getting flooded by the present, getting stuck in shame and self judgment about the past, and investing energy in “gravity problems” outside the circle of control.
We also get concrete about what helps. You’ll hear coaching questions that surface hidden assumptions, the circle of influence as a fast grounding tool, and somatic inquiry techniques that help clients name where restriction lives in the body so they can pause, breathe, and regain clarity. Along the way, Sinaz explains why feeling trapped can become “psychological malnutrition” and how restoring autonomy connects to motivation, self leadership, and sustainable change.
If you care about coaching skills, executive presence, change management, and real world tools for reducing overwhelm, this conversation is built to be used. Subscribe, share this with a fellow coach or leader, and leave a review with your biggest takeaway.
Free Gift: A reflective coaching guide to help individuals disrupt default thinking, reconnect with what matters, and consciously choose how they want to respond in moments of uncertainty and change.
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