Episode Description:
Divorce advice for women navigating emotional overwhelm, finances, co-parenting, conflict, and rebuilding confidence with attorney Nicole Sodoma.
When divorce is new and emotions are high, it can feel nearly impossible to think clearly, make financial decisions, or know what to do next. In this episode of Doing Divorce Different, Lesa Koski sits down with family law attorney, author, and certified parenting coordinator Nicole Sodoma to offer practical divorce advice for women who feel overwhelmed, afraid, or unprepared.
Drawing from 25 years of family law experience—and her own divorce—Nicole explains why emotional support and legal advice should come from different professionals, how women can begin understanding their finances, and why gathering information is one of the most empowering first steps.
Lesa and Nicole also explore why women apologize when they have done nothing wrong, how “I’m sorry” can become a way to avoid necessary conflict, and why healthy relationships require boundaries, communication, and honest conversations.
You’ll also hear meaningful divorce advice for women raising children through separation, including how to avoid loyalty binds, communicate with a difficult co-parent, and recognize that each child may experience the same divorce very differently. Nicole shares practical tools such as scheduled co-parenting communication, a shared email account for school and activity information, and the powerful biblical practice of “Selah”—pausing before responding when emotions are high.
This honest conversation offers compassionate divorce advice for women who want to make thoughtful decisions, protect their children, understand their finances, and move forward without losing themselves. Listen, save, and share this episode with someone who needs to know that she is not alone.
Timestamps:
(00:00) Introduction to divorce advice for women with Nicole Sodoma
(02:00) Nicole’s experience as a family law attorney and divorced mother
(04:40) What to do when divorce emotions feel overwhelming
(08:35) Empowering women during and after divorce
(11:00) Why women must understand their finances
(16:30) Why women say “I’m sorry” when they are not sorry
(18:15) Conflict avoidance, boundaries, and relationship repair
(21:00) Gray divorce, personal change, and evolving within marriage
(25:30) Helping children cope with separation and divorce
(27:40) How children experience divorce differently
(30:15) Staying for the children versus modeling a healthy relationship
(32:20) Prenuptial agreements and having difficult financial conversations
(37:20) Communicating with a difficult co-parent
(38:30) Using a shared email account for children’s information
(40:15) When AI may help improve co-parenting communication
(41:30) The biblical meaning of “Selah” and pausing before responding
(43:00) Final encouragement from Nicole and Lesa
Key Takeaways:
- Seek emotional support from a therapist or coach so your attorney can focus on providing legal strategy and advice.
- Learn where the money is, gather financial records, and do not allow embarrassment to keep you uninformed.
- Repeatedly saying “I’m sorry” may avoid immediate conflict, but it can prevent couples from addressing the real issue.
- Children experience divorce differently and should never be asked to carry a parent’s emotional burden or choose sides.
- Create calm, factual, and predictable co-parenting communication—and practice “Selah” by pausing before responding to a trigger.
Guest Bio:
Nicole Sodoma is a marriage-loving divorce attorney, author, certified parenting coordinator, and certified collaborative law attorney with more than 25 years of family law experience. She is the founder and managing principal of Sodoma Law, a family law firm serving clients across multiple offices and states. Nicole is also the author of Please Don’t Say You’re Sorry, a candid and compassionate book about marriage, separation, divorce, and rebuilding. As a divorced mother of three and stepparent of two, Nicole brings both professional expertise and deeply personal insight to conversations about divorce, co-parenting, finances, and life after separation.
Resource Links:
Affiliate Disclosure: Some links may be affiliate links. If you make a purchase through one of these links, Lesa may receive compensation at no additional cost to you.
Tags/Keywords:
divorce advice for women, Nicole Sodoma, Lesa Koski, Doing Divorce Different, women and divorce, divorce attorney advice, preparing for divorce, emotional divorce support, divorce financial preparation, finances during divorce, co-parenting after divorce, co-parenting communication, helping children through divorce, divorce with children, high-conflict co-parenting, gray divorce, divorce empowerment, stop apologizing, women saying sorry, boundaries in marriage, conflict resolution, life after divorce, family law attorney, parenting coordinator, collaborative divorce, prenuptial agreements, Please Don’t Say You’re Sorry, Selah pause before responding, Christian divorce support, faith during divorce, shared parenting email, OurFamilyWizard, Soberlink, divorce podcast
