One of You Wants Sex. One of You Doesn't. Here's How to Fix It

Send us Fan Mail

One of you wants sex. One of you doesn't. And somewhere along the way, that gap stopped being a difference and turned into a fight you keep having with your clothes on. Here's what nobody tells you: the gap was never the problem. It's the two stories you each start telling — one of you hears "you don't want me anymore," the other hears "you only want me for sex and you don't see everything I'm carrying." Both of you feel powerless. Both of you decide the other one is what's broken.

This week I sit down with Tarah and EJ Kerwin — a married couple, both licensed therapists, and co-founders of Relationship Renovation. They're living proof this is survivable: two people with all the clinical tools in the world who still spent the better part of a decade finding their way back to each other after four kids in eighteen months detonated the sex life they used to have. They're not here to tell you how many times a week you should be doing it. They're here to hand you the actual way back.

In this episode:

• Why the fight is never really about frequency — and the quality shift that changes everything
• The two stories high-desire and low-desire partners tell themselves, almost word for word
• Why the low-desire partner secretly holds all the power — and why it feels terrible, not powerful
• How to have the conversation without it turning into a fight (time, place, and the rules that keep it safe)
• "Safety containers" — how to rebuild touch when sex feels like too much
• Where to start tonight, and how to build back one step at a time

Come as you are, bring your partner if you've got one, and know this: there's a path back to each other if you both want it.

🎧 Find Tarah & EJ at relationshiprenovation.com and on the Relationship Renovation podcast relationshiprenovation.com/podcast. 

My YouTube is still down. But now you can catch ALL My Videos at Talksexwithannette.com

And Substack: https://substack.com/@talksexwithannette

Help me get my YouTube back! Please like and reshare my posts on X and LinkedIn and tag @teamYoutube requesting reinstatement. X: https://x.com/TalkSexAnnette/status/2093043800029741222?s=20
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/annette-benedetti-b8602342b/

Get 15% Off Blended Orgasms at Womanizer.com with my code ANNETTE15!

Go to https://talksexwithannette.com/go/sp/womanizer-blend

 The viral lemon-shaped toy everyone’s talking about — get 25% off with code ANNETTE25 at https://talksexwithannette.com/go/sp/hello-nancy-lem 🍋 

Head to Only Fans or https://talksexwithannette.com/talk-sex-with-me/ to join.

15% Off With my Code Annette15 at myfirmtech.com/annettebenedetti

Your New Favorite 365 Days of Orgasms Tool! 15% Off with code ANNETTE15 at Womanizer.com: https://talksexwithannette.com/go/sp/womanizer

Support the show

Watch on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@annettebenedetti

Connect with us
We are on all the socials:

1. TikTok: @TalkSexwithAnnette
2. Annette's Insta: @Annette Benedetti
3. My OF: @talksexwithannette
4. FB:@TalksexwithAnnette
5. Website: https://talksexwithannette.com

Cheers!