When Bio Mom Doesn't Like You: Dealing With a High Conflict Bio Mom
There are some parts of becoming a stepmom you expect to be complicated.
Your relationship with your partner's ex probably isn't one of them.
But when you're dealing with a high conflict bio mom, suddenly someone outside your marriage can affect your schedule, your relationship with your stepchildren, and sometimes even how peaceful your own home feels.
And if you're someone who is used to being liked? It can be especially hard to understand why this person seems determined not to like you.
In this episode of The Stepmom Diaries podcast from 2021, Cameron talks about how stepmoms can navigate conflict with a biological mom without getting pulled deeper into the drama. She also shares one of her favorite communication strategies for high conflict situations: the BIFF method developed by Bill Eddy of the High Conflict Institute.
In this episode, you'll learn:
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How to create healthier boundaries with a high conflict bio mom
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How the BIFF communication method can keep difficult conversations from escalating
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Why protecting kids from adult conflict and loyalty binds matters so much
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How to stop waiting for bio mom to like, approve of, or validate you
One of the biggest shifts Cameron talks about is realizing that you do not have to convince your stepchildren's mom that you are a good person, a good partner, or a good stepmom.
You can control your boundaries. You can control how you communicate. You can control the environment you help create inside your own home.
You cannot control what she thinks about you.
And sometimes accepting that is where the peace starts.
Resources Mentioned in This Episode
Get your FREE copy of my guide"10 Quick Tips To Dealing With Your Spouse's Ex" that you can download here: https://stepfamilycircle.com/high-conflict-ex-tips
Bill Eddy, of The High Conflict Institute, has some great resources to deal with high-conflict situations - both in blended families and in the workplace.
Another great resource is Stepmom Magazine - an online publication with the tagline, "Even when it's good, it's complicated."
Join us for the 6th annual The Stepmom Summit: Out Loud happening LIVE and online Sept. 14-18, 2026.
Get your FREE ticket HERE→ https://www.thestepmomsummit.com
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