π§ Listen if youβ¦
-
Are exhausted from justifying your divorce to everyone around you
-
Have family pressuring you to "keep it amicable" or reconcile
-
Suspect your ex has recruited your friends, in-laws or family
-
Aren't sure your lawyer is actually in your corner
This is general information only, not legal adviceΒ always consult a lawyer about your circumstances.Β This episode discusses family violence and coercive control. In danger? Call 000. Support: 1800 RESPECT (1800 737 732).
You can do everything right in your divorce and still be exhausted because of the people standing around you
00:00 β Divorce Support Team: Why the People Around You Matter
02:30 β Why You Never Plan Your Team (But Should)
03:30 β Lyn's Divorce 40 Years Ago: Judgement in a Country Town
04:30 β Your Ex Is Not on Your Support Team
06:00 β Family Members: Who Helps and Who Hurts
08:00 β "Keep It Amicable" Is Code for "Just Give In"
09:30 β When Family Cares More About How It Looks
10:30 β Family Violence: When Family Pressure Becomes Unsafe
11:00 β It's Not Your Job to Explain Coercive Control to Everyone
12:00 β The One Loyal Family Member Who Saw Behind the Mask
13:00 β What to Say to Pressuring Family Members
14:30 β In-Laws: Pausing Even the Good Relationships
17:00 β Enabler In-Laws and When to Distance Fast
19:00 β Family Violence Orders: When Family Contact Breaks the Rules
20:30 β Friends: Who Rolls Up Their Sleeves vs Who Stays "Neutral"
23:00 β Judgy Friends and the Gossip Collectors
25:00 β Screenshots to Your Ex: The Social Media Trap
26:30 β Don't Forget the Fun Friends: Finding Glimmers of Joy
28:30 β Online Support Groups: The Risks Nobody Talks About
30:00 β Commenting Publicly About Your Case: Court Consequences
32:00 β The Tom Holland Rule for Handling Criticism
32:45 β Choosing a Lawyer: What the Right One Looks Like
36:00 β Lawyer Red Flags: Gatekeeping Your Story (Episode 166)
37:00 β Brave Lawyers vs Lawyers Afraid of Court
38:30 β The Three As: Affability, Availability, Ability
39:30 β Why You Need Your Own Psychologist
41:00 β Emotion-Driven Strategy: The Most Expensive Mistake
42:30 β Kids and School: One Contact Person + the Counsellor
45:30 β Church and Faith Communities: Support or Pressure?
49:00 β Your Kids Can't Be on Your Team
50:00 β Bad Podcasts, Reddit and Wrong Information
53:00 β Rapid Fire: Neutral Besties, Slow Lawyers & Nosy Sisters
56:30 β High-Conflict Ex: What Your Team Needs to Be
58:30 β Avoidant Ex: The Friends Who Do the Hard Yakka
59:30 β Manipulative & Controlling Ex: Vetting for Flying Monkeys
1:00:30 β Amicable Split: Why You Still Need a Team
1:01:45 β "It's My Decision": Mum's Cushion Wisdom
π Resources
10 Essential Boundaries for a Healthier Divorce (Ep 173)Β
When In-Laws Interfere in Your Divorce (Ep 305)Β
Legal Gatekeeping: Is Your Lawyer Telling Your Full Story? (Ep 166)
1800 RESPECT β 1800 737 732 | Lifeline β 13 11 14 | Police β 000
The Divorce Course β www.thedivorcecourse.com.au
If this episode helped you work out who belongs in your corner, please follow, rate, review and share The Divorce Course Podcast.