What's the difference between a fetish, a kink, and just really liking something? Where do fetishes come from?
Niki Davis-Fainbloom’s entire job is to help people make peace with their fetish. She holds a masters in psychology, studied sex therapy at the Kinsey Institute & has been working with clients for 8 years. She’s also the author of Fetish: smash taboos & celebrate what turns you on.
In this episode, you’ll hear about some of the more unusual fetishes, where fetishes come from, where we draw the line in ethical fetishes (Race? Disability? Yikes!), the difference between a kink & a fetish, why people hide what turns them on (& what happens when they don’t).
If you liked this episode, you’ll also like episode 286: WHAT IS MEDICALLY ASSISTED SEX [REMASTERED]?
Guest:
https://a.co/d/0165o2Qg
https://www.instagram.com/missbloomsexeducator/
https://www.facebook.com/niki.davis.7
https://www.nikidavisf.com/about-niki
https://x.com/nikidavisf?lang=en
Sponsors:
https://www.historicpensacola.org/about-us/
00:00:56 — What Actually Makes Something a Fetish (vs. Just Being a Preference)
00:03:50 — Fetish vs. Kink: What's the Difference?
00:04:27 — Unusual Fetishes: Vore, Macrophilia, and the Wet Floor Sign Guy
00:08:46 — Balloon Fetishes, Online Communities, and SizeCon
00:09:57 — Where Do Fetishes Come From? The Conditioning Theory
00:12:34 — The Baby Fetish, Pregnancy Kink, and Stress as a Factor
00:15:23 — Culture, Decades, and How Your Childhood TV Shapes Your Desires
00:17:02 — Japan's Panty Vending Machines: Normalization and the Fetish Question
00:19:47 — The Most Common Fetishes by Volume
00:21:21 — Sneezing Fetishes, Feet Everywhere, and the Can't-Unsee Phenomenon
00:25:15 — The Neuroscience of Foot Fetishes: Somatosensory Cortex and Amputation Studies
00:27:38 — Is There a Genetic Component? Dopamine, Novelty-Seeking, and Risk
00:30:11 — Disgust, Arousal, and Why Evolution Had to Make a Compromise
00:32:45 — Fetishes and Trauma: Separating Myth from Reality
00:34:28 — Rape Kink, Survivors, and Reclaiming Control
00:35:38 — Is Shame Part of What Makes a Fetish Work?
00:37:50 — Grindr at the RNC, Anti-Gay Preachers, and the Forbidden Fruit Effect
00:40:08 — Tools for Working Through Shame: Postponing Worry, Self-Compassion Letters
00:43:42 — How and When to Disclose Your Fetish to a Partner
00:50:51 — The Ethics of Fetishes: Race, Disability, and Objectification
00:55:21 — DSM Paraphilias, Non-Consent, and Where People Can Get Help
00:57:31 — AI Romantic Partners, Dirty Talk Experiments, and the Capitalism Interruption
01:02:32 — Niki's Documentary, the Book, and Where to Find Her
Request to join my private Facebook Group, MFR Curious Insiders: https://www.facebook.com/share/g/1BAt3bpwJC/
Follow me in all the places:
https://www.meredithforreal.com/
https://www.instagram.com/the_curiousintrovert/
meredith@meredithforreal.com
https://www.youtube.com/meredithforreal
https://www.facebook.com/curiousintrovert
