I have been trying to record this episode for months. I kept circling it, flirting with it, putting it down, picking it back up. And I am finally here.
This is a burnout episode, but not the kind where I hand you a list of things to try. This is the real story of how I got so burnt out I could barely be visible online for two years, what happened when my 17-year relationship ended this spring and the bottom dropped out in a way I did not see coming, and what the long, unglamorous, deeply personal process of coming back to life has actually looked like for me.
I share things in this episode that I have not shared publicly before. About what I was doing all those years trying to make myself safe in relationship. About cracking a rib from coughing and spending weeks in the bathtub and asking myself over and over, am I willing to be here? Am I willing to be who I am? Even here? Even now?
I also share what I have come to understand about burnout at its most foundational level. Because underneath the tools and the practices and the saved reels and the books you have read, there are dominant messages running the show. And until you know what yours are, all the tools in the world are only going to get you so far.
This is the episode I needed to make. I hope it is the one you needed to hear.
xMara
My BEST tools, matched to exactly what you need. Take the [free] needs quiz: needsquiz.com
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