What do you do when someone talks down to you, underestimates you, or makes an assumption about what you are capable of? Nearly fifty years ago, Dolly Parton gave us a remarkable lesson in how to handle it. During a now-famous interview, Barbara Walters questioned everything from Dolly's Appalachian upbringing to her appearance and the way others perceived her. Dolly could have become defensive. Instead, she turned the conversation around in a way that is just as relevant in the workplace today.
In this episode of The Dr. CK Bray Show, Dr. Bray explores what Dolly understood about confidence, identity, and staying in control when someone tries to put you in a box. He also explains what happens in the brain when our competence or status feels threatened, why the response we wish we had made often comes to us twenty minutes later, and how to keep a difficult interaction from hijacking your thinking.
You'll also learn one simple mental shift you can use the next time someone underestimates you: how to separate what may be true from the meaning someone else attaches to it. Dolly's response is funny, smart, and surprisingly instructive. It might change the way you handle the next person who talks down to you.
Quotes from Dr. Bray
"You can acknowledge what is true about yourself without surrendering control over what that truth means."
"One of the fastest ways to become defensive is to accept someone else's interpretation of you, and then start arguing against it."
"As a leader, we never humiliate other people. If you have a hard conversation, it happens one on one, never in front of people."
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