You ask for help. He nods along. Next week looks exactly the same. If you've wondered how to talk to your husband about the mental load without it ending in tears or silence, this conversation is a good place to start.
On The ManFlu, host Lucy McAfee talks with Stacy McCann, a licensed therapist, writer, speaker, and parent coach whose practice focuses on maternal burnout. Stacy says many moms walk into her office assuming they are doing something wrong or that they are “broken.” Her job is to show them there was a path paved for them long before they became mothers, by the roles they grew up watching and a modern job description for motherhood no one could ever meet.
Lucy confesses her own mom guilt over a basket of unfolded laundry, and Stacy shares how she helps clients trace where that critical voice comes from. She explains why “I” statements carry more weight for women raised to stay quiet, and what to do when a partner agrees in the moment and nothing changes.
Fair Play by Eve Rodsky can feel like a lot to take on when the mental load of motherhood sits mostly with you. Stacy starts smaller, with a weekly family meeting for couples built around the calendar. She closes with one small shift for reclaiming the small pockets of buffer time in your day that no one else has access to. Press play to learn how to talk to your husband about the mental load in a way that moves things forward at home.
Episode Breakdown:
00:00 Welcome And Meeting Therapist Stacy McCann
02:10 How the Pandemic Exposed Maternal Self-Sacrifice
04:57 Why Moms Arrive Convinced They Are Broken
07:28 The Impossible Job Description for Modern Mothers
12:52 Mom Guilt and the Unfolded Laundry Basket
19:38 Why I Statements Are a Mindset Shift
26:20 When He Nods Along and Nothing Changes
34:09 Starting a Weekly Household State of the Union
39:51 Online Shaming and the Messy Middle of Marriage
47:41 One Small Shift to Reclaim Your Buffer Time
Books Referenced on the Show:
Fair Play: A Game-Changing Solution for When You Have Too Much to Do (and More Life to Live) by Eve Rodsky
Find Your Unicorn Space: Reclaim Your Creative Life in a Too-Busy World by Eve Rodsky
Drop the Ball: Achieving More by Doing Less by Tiffany Dufu
Connect with Stacy McCann:
Follow Stacy on Instagram
Visit the Present Moment website
Connect with Lucy McAfee:
Follow Lucy on Instagram
Connect with Lucy on LinkedIn
Visit The ManFlu website
Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm
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