In this episode of The Missing Conversation, host Steve Evans sits down with Jeff — a man from Cedar Rapids, Iowa, raised in a competitive, no-coddling household to figure things out on his own, who built a successful thirty-year financial career on a self he now describes plainly: money, ego, and what other people thought of him.
Jeff reflects on the identity he spent fifty years constructing, and the single morning that dismantled it — and on the choice he named out loud to his sons in the hours after: two roads, one of anger and despair, one of love, hope, and inspiration. He traces the honest reckonings that followed, the ones no one prepares you for: the conversation with the mirror that ended thirty-six years of drinking, and the granddaughter, Brightn, who arrived like a light three weeks after the darkness.
He speaks candidly about rebuilding himself from the ground up — trading the man who measured his worth in dollars for one measured in purpose — and about carrying that forward through further loss with a discipline he had to choose, not feel: that pain is unavoidable, but suffering is a choice.
With unflinching honesty, humor, and a refusal of easy labels, Jeff explores presence over rumination, vulnerability as his real strength, and the difference between surviving and being reborn — landing on what turned out to matter most: that your story doesn't end with what happened to you. It can begin with what you choose to do next.
Content note: This episode discusses suicide and personal loss. If you're struggling, call or text 988 (U.S.) for the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline.
