Content note: This episode discusses adoption, abandonment, family estrangement and uncertainty surrounding adoption origin stories. Please listen with care if these subjects feel personal to you.
What happens when rejection from other people becomes the way we reject ourselves?
In this deeply honest and uplifting conversation, Ellie is joined by Anna Jinja Mather, an author, broadcaster and international adoptee who was born in Seoul, South Korea, and raised in Iowa.
Anna shares how adoption shaped her understanding of identity, family and belonging. She discusses the story she was given about her beginnings, the questions she now carries about its accuracy, and why she has not yet returned to Korea or taken a DNA test.
Together, Ellie and Anna explore the lasting effects of rejection and abandonment, the search for external validation, and Anna’s belief that the most damaging rejection can be the rejection we direct towards ourselves.
Anna explains what it means to “adopt and foster ourselves”, choosing to nurture our own worth, identity and potential instead of waiting for somebody else to confirm that we are lovable.
They also discuss Anna’s book, Adopting Grace, how writing became part of her healing, the families we choose, becoming a stepmother and step-grandmother, and the importance of approaching life with kindness, curiosity and humour.
Topics include:
• International and transracial adoption
• Rejection, abandonment and self-worth
• Identity and the search for belonging
• Questioning adoption origin stories
• DNA testing and the fear of changing your personal narrative
• Chosen family, step-parenting and unexpected love
• Writing as a form of healing
• Anna’s book, Adopting Grace
• Learning to adopt and foster yourself
• Choosing kindness and curiosity
This conversation is a reminder that whatever rejection you have experienced, you do not have to continue rejecting yourself. You are worthy of love, belonging and the opportunity to become the person you hope to be.
Connect with Anna Jinja:
Website:
https://www.annajinja.com/
Buy Adopting Grace on Amazon:
https://www.amazon.com/Adopting-Grace-Anna-Jinja-ebook/dp/B0DJZPQ44K
Buy Adopting Grace through UK Bookshop:
https://uk.bookshop.org/p/books/adopting-grace-anna-jinja/eb4507565923a3cd
Listen to The Anna Jinja Show:
https://www.buzzsprout.com/2185315
YouTube:
https://www.youtube.com/@TheAnnaJinjaShow
Instagram:
https://www.instagram.com/annajinjashow/
Facebook:
https://www.facebook.com/annajinjashow
LinkedIn:
https://www.linkedin.com/in/anna-jinja-mather-5440794
X:
https://x.com/annajinjashow
