Nobody walks into a marriage planning to leave it, yet so many midlife women are quietly asking whether to stay or go. Your body often knows the answer first.
In this episode I sit down with Betsy Pake, certified master coach and founder of The Navigate Method, to unpack the question so many midlife women are asking: should I stay or should I go? We talk about why women are choosing peace over partnership, the purgatory of indecision, and how an unhappy marriage so often sits underneath a woman's drinking. Betsy shares her Mirror, Mend or Move method and how to tell a hard season from a marriage that is not coming back. This conversation won't tell you whether to stay or leave, but it will give you the clarity to decide for yourself.
Key Takeaways
-If he only wants to work on the marriage once you are ready to leave, look at why. It is often because he doesn't want his own life to change, not because of your unhappiness.
-Find a witness. Saying out loud how bad things really helps you see what is real when your brain has been minimizing it for years.
-Surrender sounds like "I don't know what I'm going to do, but it's not this." From there, ask what would need to change for you to feel whole again.
-The women who rebuild best after divorce own it: this isn't what I wanted, but it's what I have, and it's the best thing for me.
Timestamps
Why Women Initiate Most Divorces After 55 (00:00)
The Purgatory Of Indecision In Your Marriage (03:49)
Doing It All And Still Not Feeling Seen (06:25)
Is Your Marriage The Reason You Drink? (10:07)
How Women Shrink To Save A Marriage (13:04)
He's A Good Man, So Why Am I Unhappy? (25:23)
How To Know If Your Marriage Is Over (27:10)
Can A Roommate Marriage Be Saved? (29:50)
Your Body Knows Before Your Brain Does (32:15)
Breaking Free From Good Wife Shame (38:08)
Mirror, Mend Or Move: The 3 Door Method (43:25)
Should I Leave? You Already Know The Answer (49:51)
Can You Trust Divorce Decisions In Perimenopause? (53:53)
What Life After Midlife Divorce Really Looks Like (01:00:10)
Numbing Marriage Unhappiness With Alcohol (01:03:34)
Find Betsy Pake And The Art Of Living Big (01:07:49)
5 Foods to Swap
The five foods stealing your energy and adding visceral fat in midlife, plus what to eat instead. Five simple swaps, big difference in how you feel.Get your free guide → https://programs.sarahrusbatch.com/free-guide-5-food
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Betsy Pake is a certified master coach, speaker, and founder of The Navigate Method, a coaching program that helps women chart a new path in, or out of, their marriage. Drawing on her own experience of leaving a marriage and rebuilding her life, she helps women heal old patterns, calm their nervous systems, and trust their own decisions. She is trauma informed, trained in NLP, and hosts The Art of Living Big podcast.
Website: https://betsypake.com
Instagram: @betsypake
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Find out more about my other programs here: https://sarahrusbatch.com/
If you want to join a space where women feel safe to be seen, ask the questions they don’t always say out loud and connect with others going through the same, join my free Facebook group, Women’s Wellbeing Collective here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/342319476897067
