After narcissistic abuse, most of us are so focused on what we don't want that we never learned what a healthy relationship actually looks like. In this episode — Part 2 of my series on creating healthy relationships after narcissistic abuse — I'm giving you the practical roadmap.
I'm walking you through 4 green flags that will tell you more about a person's character than any red flag checklist ever could. And if conflict has always felt like a warning sign to you, this episode is going to change the way you see it forever.
In this episode, I cover:
Why the absence of bad behavior doesn't automatically mean someone is healthy — and why this is how so many survivors end up in more than one narcissistic relationship
How to tell whether conflict is revealing a communication issue in yourself — or a deeper character problem in them
What accountability actually looks like in a healthy relationship (and the two extremes survivors tend to go to that make this hard to see clearly)
How to know whether a difference in processing styles is normal and workable — or a one-sided dynamic that's just the narc relationship in a new disguise
The single most important skill for identifying a healthy relationship: learning to tell the difference between your intuition and your anxiety
I also share the distinction that changed everything for me: anxiety is about uncertainty — intuition is about incongruence. If you've ever wondered "Is this my gut or is this my trauma?" this episode will give you a clear, practical way to tell the difference.
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