If you’re a parent of a neurodivergent child (autistic, ADHD, PDA, & more; high, medium, or low support needs), you may have noticed that mainstream parenting advice doesn’t always make sense for you, your child, or your family’s needs.
In this episode, Dr. Carolyn Solo & I explore the differences between neurodiversity-affirming parenting (which values connection, autonomy, & nervous system co-regulation) vs. mainstream parenting (which emphasizes control, hierarchy, & obedience).
We discuss why it’s important to attune to the unique needs of each child’s nervous system; and why PDA (often referred to as “pathological demand avoidance”) is better framed as “pervasive drive for autonomy.”
Carolyn shares her experiences of supporting her neurodivergent child through burnout recovery. She names the importance of trusting that your child will let you know what they need, and that you are the expert on your child - even when traditional parenting advice tells you that you’re “wrong.”
Join us in a deeply honest conversation, that might help you feel less alone - and remind you that connection with your child begins with connection with yourself.
CHAPTERS
03:10 What is PDA (persistent drive for autonomy) & how does it show up in children?
05:44 Navigating burnout in neurodivergent children
12:58 Navigating doubt, guilt, & nervous system dysregulation as a parent
19:23 The impacts of a late-in-life ADHD diagnosis
26:47 What is a neuro-affirming approach to parenting?
37:27 A therapeutic approach: EMDR intensives
🌿 RESOURCES
>> Learn about PDA: www.pdanorthamerica.org
🌿 About the Guest
Dr. Carolyn Solo (PhD, LCSW, she/her) is an EMDR consultant & EMDR intensive therapist in Vermont & Pennsylvania. She specializes in EMDR intensives for parents of neurodivergent kids, and provides coaching for EMDR therapists who want to launch intensives in their practices to provide clients with exceptional outcomes. Carolyn is a mom of three girls, the oldest of whom is PDA profile AuDHD.
🌿 Connect with Carolyn
>> Websites: www.integritaswellnessllc.com / www.futuretemplateparent.com
>> IG: @integritas_intensive_emdr / @futuretemplateparent
>> For therapists: EMDR Intensive Workbook
🌿 About the Host
Liz Zhou is a neurodivergent therapist of color, coach, & speaker based in Colorado (MA, LPC, she/her). She helps highly sensitive, neurodivergent adults & couples heal their nervous systems and connect with their authentic selves. Her specialties include: Brainspotting, EMDR, IFS, Psychedelic Integration, & Nervous System Intensives (deep-dive, accelerated therapy).
🌿 Connect with Liz
>> Join my weekly newsletter: Liz’s Neurodivergent Letters
>> IG: www.instagram.com/liz.holistic.therapist
