What does it mean to live and love beyond binaries?
In this episode of The B-Side, hosts Marie, Slaine and Ares are joined by Toby — a bi+, intersex and agender person and relationship counsellor — for a thoughtful conversation about identity, intimacy and connection beyond rigid categories.
We explore how being intersex, agender and bi+ intersect in everyday life, shaping self-understanding, relationships and belonging in a world that still prefers simple labels. Toby shares lived experience around language, visibility and navigating both LGBTQIA+ spaces and broader society.
The conversation then moves into ethically non-monogamous frameworks and relationship anarchy, unpacking what whole-person-centred relating looks like in practice. We discuss autonomy, care and freedom in relationships, and how intimacy doesn’t have to rely on ownership or hierarchy.
We also examine co-dependence and enmeshment — how intensity can be mistaken for intimacy, where closeness becomes constricting, and what healthy independence inside connection really means.
A reflective and affirming episode about moving beyond binaries — in identity, in relationships, and in how we connect with one another.
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