Episode 39: The Duality of Narcissism - He Was a Pastor in Public, but a Monster at Home | Guest Episode with Lena Rivers

What happens when the person abusing you is also the person everyone admires on Sunday morning?

In the first guest episode of Set Apart + Called, I sit down with Lena Rivers to talk about surviving narcissistic abuse inside a marriage with a pastor whose public image looked nothing like the reality happening behind closed doors.

We talk about spiritual abuse, manipulation inside the church, the pressure to stay silent, and what happens when faith becomes tangled with fear, control, and image management. Lena also shares what it was like asking church leadership for help — only to watch the institution protect the abuser instead.

This conversation is honest, uncomfortable, and deeply important for anyone who has ever questioned themselves inside a relationship that looked “good” from the outside.

• The duality of the public pastor and private abuser
• Spiritual manipulation and image control
• Why narcissists can thrive in church environments
• What happens when leadership protects the wrong person
• Rebuilding faith after spiritual abuse
• The reality of leaving and healing after narcissistic abuse

Lena Rivers is a narcissistic abuse survivor and educator focused on helping others understand coercive control, manipulation, and post-separation abuse. She is currently working on a book for survivors navigating recovery after narcissistic relationships.

TikTok / Instagram: @thrive_free_npd