Almost every woman going through a divorce has this conversation. Not about the superannuation. Not about the investments. About the house. And it usually sounds something like — I don't care about anything else. I just need to keep the house.
In this episode Helene shares her own experience — and the very real cost of the decision she made — to have an honest conversation about what's really driving that need, and what it might actually be costing you.
IN THIS EPISODE YOU'LL HEAR:
- Why women fight so hard to keep the family home — and what the research actually says about what children need after separation
- The financial reality nobody talks about — it's not just the mortgage
- What it actually means to "keep the house" — and why it's not always as simple as taking your ex off the mortgage
- Helene's own story — the numbers, the sacrifice, and the hindsight
- Practical tips for anyone navigating this decision right now
- The alternative nobody considers — and why renting is not failing
- The therapeutic coaching lens — the belief underneath the decision, and a powerful exercise to help you hear what your back brain is actually saying
- The questions to sit with before you decide anything
THE STATS
- Divorce in Australia increased 4.1% in 2024-25
- The average age at divorce is now 47.3 for men and 44.4 for women
- Women's average superannuation balances at retirement are around 23% lower than men's
- 30% of retired women relied on their partner's income to meet living costs in 2024-25
- Women earn over $12,000 less than men per year
- 86% of child support recipients via the Australian Child Support Agency are women
- 22% of single parent families are in housing stress — compared to just 6.9% of couples with dependent children (HILDA Survey)
A USEFUL EXERCISE
Finish this sentence out loud — don't think too hard, just let it come:
"I believe I need to keep the house because..."
Whatever came up — that's the belief worth looking at.
THE QUESTIONS TO SIT WITH BEFORE YOU DECIDE
- In five years, will the version of me who made this decision thank me — or be drowning because of me?
- Am I keeping the house for my kids — or for me?
- If the house burned down tomorrow and the decision was made for me — what would I do? How would I feel in six months?
- Is the house the home — or am I the home?
RESOURCES MENTIONED
- 1800RESPECT — 1800 737 732 — available 24/7 for domestic and family violence support
- Australian Institute of Family Studies — aifs.gov.au
- AHURI — ahuri.edu.au
- Federal Circuit and Family Court of Australia — fcfcoa.gov.au
- MoneySmart — moneysmart.gov.au
- Simple Split Financials — Julie Garis (add details)
CONNECT WITH US
Helene Psarakis — ThinkBowl Therapeutic Coaching
thinkbowl.com.au | helene@thinkbowl.com.au
Naomi Holmes — Her Money Matters
hermoneymatters.com.au | naomi@hermoneymatters.com.au
DISCLAIMER
The information shared in this episode is general in nature and does not constitute legal, financial or therapeutic advice. Please seek appropriate professional advice for your specific circumstances.
This episode covers the property tax measures from the 2026-27 Federal Budget, including the abolition of negative gearing for established residential property and the replacement of the CGT discount with cost base indexation. Both have since passed into law as the Treasury Laws Amendment (Tax Reform No. 1) Act 2026, effective 1 July 2027. Related measures — including the treatment of discretionary trusts and a fix for the co-ownership "widow's tax" issue — are still being finalised in follow-up legislation and were not yet settled at the time of recording.
Podcasts are a great place to start, but when it comes to your own finances, super or lending position, please get guidance from a qualified professional. If you'd like more support, Naomi offers one-on-one coaching and financial education courses, and Her Money Matters has a panel of licensed financial advisers who can help with personal advice. Naomi Holmes and Her Money Matters are licensed by Alethea Partners Pty Ltd, Australian Financial Services Licence 557729.
Your money matters. Your future matters. And you? You matter.
