If you’ve ever been hurt, reacted, and then watched your reaction become the only thing that mattered, this episode names that pattern clearly. Lisa Sonni sits down with therapist Dr. Les Carter, who brings more than 40 years of experience in counseling, anger management, and emotional wellness, to unpack why narcissistic abuse feels so destabilizing.
They break down the control tactics, double binds, “gotcha” dynamics, and DARVO-style flipping that turn your distress into the problem while the original harm disappears.
Dr. Carter explains how narcissists operate from a false self, stay highly defensive, and often remain stuck in what he calls “trained incompetence.” Together they distinguish healthy boundaries from control, healthy interdependence from codependence, and emphasize that you are responsible for your own well-being—not for fixing someone committed to misunderstanding you. The takeaway is powerful: make room for the reality of the relationship, stay connected to supportive people, and trust your own perceptions again.
Join Lisa Sonni & Dr. Peter Salerno in Boston, MA November 13-15, 2026 here: https://lisasonni.com/unbreakable-and-irreplaceable/
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