Settling in to School - The Autism Mums Podcast | Lyssna här

Another school year, another round of settling in, and if the excitement wore off around day two, you are not alone.

In this episode we get honest about what settling in to school really looks like for autistic children and their parents. Not the picture-book version, where everyone skips happily through the gates, but the version most of us actually live: the good days, the wobbly days, and the moments when the school says everything's fine and then your child falls apart the second they're back in the car.

We talk about masking, restraint collapse, and why settling in isn't a straight line, a supply teacher or a change to the timetable can undo weeks of progress. We also share the practical things that have helped in our own homes, from visual timetables and countdown timers to low-demand afternoons and communication books with school, plus how to know when it's time to ask for more support.

Key Takeaways

Settling in rarely looks like the picture-book version, and that's normal, not a sign you're doing something wrong
Settling can go backwards, a supply teacher, a change to the timetable, or a break like Christmas can undo weeks of progress
A school saying "they're fine" doesn't cancel out what you see at home, restraint collapse is real and often shows up with the people your child feels safest with
Visual supports, like timetables and countdown timers, remove uncertainty and can calm anxiety even for children who read and talk well
Low-demand afternoons matter more than a big welcome-home activity, most children just need space to decompress after school
Keeping a written record of what you're seeing, however small it feels at the time, builds the evidence you may need later for referrals or support
If home behaviours aren't shifting despite the visual supports and low-demand time, it's worth raising it properly with the teacher and the SENCo together
Don't forget your own wellbeing in all of this, you can't pour from an empty cup, and it's okay to lean on other parents going through the same thing

Mentioned in This Episode

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