Jerry Seinfeld had it figured out decades ago.
Personal distance is a very important thing. There is a new personal distance. ATM distance. When someone is using an ATM you want to be about six feet back. Because people get a little edgy around that ATM. Their eyes are darting all around.
The other place you want to be about six feet away is a urinal.
ATMs and urinals. Whenever someone is taking valuables out of their pants, you want to give them as much room as possible.
Rand Paul posted the clip with one line.
“Now we know where Anthony Fauci got his six-foot rule from.”
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The joke lands because the underlying point is genuinely damning.
The six-foot social distancing rule that shut down schools, destroyed small businesses, ended family gatherings, kept elderly people isolated from their children and grandchildren, and defined American life for two years was never based on scientific evidence. It was not derived from rigorous studies. It was not validated by data. A senior CDC official admitted to Congress that the six-foot rule simply appeared and was likely based on intuition rather than any specific study.
Fauci and his team took a number that belonged in a Seinfeld bit about ATMs and urinals, attached it to a federal mandate, and enforced it on every American regardless of age, health status, location, or actual risk.
Schools closed for two years based on this rule. Children fell behind academically and socially in ways that studies are still documenting. Small restaurants that could not maintain six feet of distance between tables shut down permanently. Churches that could not spread their congregations far enough apart were fined or shuttered. Families kept grandparents away from grandchildren for months based on the same scientific foundation as a 1990s stand-up routine.
Rand Paul sat across from Fauci in hearing after hearing and demanded the data behind these decisions. Fauci called him wrong. The media called Paul dangerous. Social media platforms censored anyone who questioned the rules.
The six-foot rule came from the same place as ATM anxiety.
Paul knew it at the time. The declassified documents confirmed it. And now a Seinfeld clip from thirty years ago makes the point more effectively than any Senate hearing ever could.
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