Pee, Poo, Puke. The Grand Slam.
This week, Johnny Vaughan and Gavin “The Woodman” Woods celebrate your own Bloomin’ Legends, with two listener stories involving heroic determination, disastrous decisions and a truly staggering amount of bodily waste.
There’s a dad who thinks he can outmanoeuvre a septic tank pump, a naval aviator whose big weekend ends in the dreaded “grand slam”, and a potential merchandise scheme where your reward might be permission to buy something.
What You’ll Hear in This Episode:
💩 The sludge pump incident – when a pipe comes loose and sewage starts flooding the garden, Sean’s dad decides to reconnect it while the machine’s still running. It requires split-second timing. He does not have split-second timing
🔧 “I’ve come this far…” – already covered from head to toe, one determined father keeps trying the same manoeuvre, with increasingly brown results. His family have never laughed harder. He never sees the funny side
⚓ A seagull, some jelly powder and a big night out – after a week of escape and evasion training, a group of budding naval aviators ignore the warnings about overindulging and head straight for a weekend on the booze
🤢 Johnny One Stroke completes the grand slam – one small sink, several urgent problems and an ambitious series of turns. A listener nomination that leaves Johnny and Gav in absolutely no doubt: he’s straight in
👕 The exclusive right to buy a sweatshirt – the boys discuss mugs, merchandise and a coupon system that makes being rewarded for your loyalty sound suspiciously like an application process
Got a legend you want us to cover? A disastrous DIY dad, a one-eyed wonder or another grand slam contender? We want your stories.
📩 Send it to: bloominlegends@global.com
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🎥 Watch the full episode on YouTube: youtube.com/@bloominlegends
Listen to all episodes on Global Player, download the app, or visit www.globalplayer.com
Bloomin’ Legends is a Global production.
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