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If you have an addicted loved one and you have been holding everything together for longer than you can remember, this is the episode where it starts to come apart, in the best possible way.
Jason takes you inside one of the most pivotal weeks of the six-week Live Unhooked Masterclass. You will learn why cleaning the goldfish never works, what really happens in Step Four of recovery, and the one psychological model that explains why the same loving move you have made a hundred times keeps producing the same painful result.
EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS
[01:00] Jason sets the tone: "This is the masterclass. We go deep, quick."
[01:36] Why powerlessness is not weakness, and why calling addiction a brain disease changes everything.
[02:31] The story of Jason naming his disease "Sancho" in his fifth treatment center.
[05:18] The goldfish framework: why cleaning the bowl matters more than rinsing the fish.
[10:23] "The cave we fear to enter holds the treasure we seek." Joseph Campbell sets up Step Four.
[13:45] A live five-round box breathing exercise with Jason.
[21:01] Steps Three and Four: the decision to surrender versus entering the cave.
[25:19] The Drama Triangle introduced: rescuer, persecutor, victim defined.
[30:26] How all three roles can show up in the same person on the same day.
[43:32] Jason gets personal: how the Drama Triangle has shown up at home during Brin's battle with cancer.
[50:36] This week's assignments: the seven-day personal experiment and the Step Four workbook.
[57:09] "Trust the process." Jason's closing challenge.
THE DRAMA TRIANGLE
Jason walks the group through the Karpman Drama Triangle, named by psychologist Stephen Karpman in the 1960s. Three roles families touched by addiction tend to cycle through.
The rescuer fixes everything and is exhausted. Their identity depends on the chaos continuing. The persecutor weaponizes love and feeds shame, and shame fuels addiction, it does not stop it. The victim says I cannot, and the suffering becomes an identity.
The part nobody tells you: these roles rotate. In a single day, the same person can rescue at breakfast, persecute at lunch, and collapse into victim by evening. Awareness is the first step out.
THE GIFT INSIDE THE CAVE
Jason discloses that the Drama Triangle has shown up not only in his recovery work but at home as his wife Brin has battled cancer. He has caught himself using bravado as a mask for victimhood. The awareness is not shame. It is a gift.
He introduces a core teaching: our greatest weaknesses and our greatest strengths are two sides of the same coin. His anxiety drives the habits that built Brick House Recovery. His ADHD, harnessed with intention, becomes a superpower. Step Four is not punishment. It is a treasure hunt.
THIS WEEK'S WORK
The seven-day personal experiment. Give up one thing you depend on (coffee, scrolling, snooze, sugar) for seven days. Not for deprivation. For empathy. You cannot fully understand what your addicted loved one is up against until you have sat with your own brain bargaining.
The Step Four supplemental workbook. A daily self-inventory designed to surface patterns, ego defense mechanisms, and the roles you play in your family system.
"Place your recovery first. This is the very thing I am asking your addicted loved ones to do. All the other areas in your life will be blessed in time."
RESOURCES
Unhooked: How to Help an Addicted Loved One Recover by Jason Coombs (Audible, Amazon)
Brick House Recovery: https://brickhouserecovery.com
The Live Unhooked Masterclass
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Support the show
Join Jason Coombs LIVE each week for tips and tricks and LIVE Q&A’s. Go to https://www.liveunhooked.com/live-unhooked.
For information about treatment services visit https://www.brickhouserecovery.com/
For more information about Warrior Heart Bootcamp for men visit www.awarriorheart.com
https://awarriorheart.com/
$100 DISCOUNT CODE for Warrior Heart = 2026Brick100
To learn more about the women’s retreat, Heart of a Woman:
https://theheartofawoman.net/
$100 DISCOUNT CODE for Heart of a Woman = 2026Brick100
