The Trap of Should: How Expectations Quiet Your Strategy

Summary

In this episode, Kaan breaks down one of the biggest hidden forces that keeps people stuck: the word “should.”
Using Seth Godin’s excerpt “Should Might Be a Trap” as the foundation, we explore how “should” is almost never your voice — it’s culture’s voice, family’s voice, or outdated expectations. And when you operate from “should,” you lose your clarity, your agency, and your strategy.

Kaan walks through how “should” shows up in fitness, business, personal growth, parenting, identity, and everyday decision-making — and how replacing it with “What do I NEED today?” radically changes your momentum and direction. This episode is practical, mindset-driven, and packed with questions that help you reclaim your life from expectations that no longer serve you.

Takeaways

• “Should” is a trap — it pulls you toward conformity, not clarity.
• Most “shoulds” are inherited, not consciously chosen.
• Strategy requires choice — “should” removes choice.
• Replace “I should…” with “What do I need today to become who I want to be?”
• Real progress comes from commitment, not pressure.
• Cut the actions, roles, and obligations that keep you from growing.
• Ask the 3 strategy questions:
  1. Is this from clarity or pressure?
  2. Does this move me toward who I want to be?
  3. Would I still choose this if no one had an opinion?
• You don’t grow by meeting expectations — you grow by making decisions with intention.
• Strategy is acting from identity, not obligation.
• The life you want requires stepping away from the life you “should” live.