What if the conversation you've been avoiding isn't going to cost you what you're afraid of losing - but could actually give you something you've been missing?
When we're unhappy in a relationship, job, friendship or family dynamic, our brains tend to calculate one thing: what could I lose if I make a change?
But there's another calculation we rarely make: what could I gain?
In this episode, I'm exploring why we naturally focus on what we might lose when we're facing a difficult conversation or big decision and what can change when we start looking at what we might gain instead.
I talk about loss aversion, the habit of rehearsing worst-case scenarios, and why the conversations we avoid can become far bigger and scarier in our heads than they are in reality.
I also share the story of a coaching client who was rebuilding her life after the breakdown of her marriage. By changing the questions she was asking herself, she moved from feeling powerless and uncertain to creating a life she genuinely felt excited about.
If there's a conversation you've been avoiding, a change you're afraid to make, or a situation you know isn't working anymore, I want you to try a different calculation: What might become possible if this actually goes well?
What You'll Learn
* Why your brain naturally focuses more on potential loss than potential gain
* What loss aversion is and how it can keep you stuck
* Why we repeatedly rehearse difficult conversations going badly
* How imagining a different outcome can change the decisions you make
* Why avoiding a difficult conversation can have a cost of its own
* How asking "What might I gain?" can shift you from feeling powerless to taking action
* Why asking for what you need is an important part of building confidence and self-worth
* How having the conversation can change not only your circumstances, but your relationship with yourself
Resources Mentioned
Free Video Guide: How to Have the Conversation You've Been Avoiding
If this episode resonated with you, I've created a free video guide to help you take the next step.
Inside, I'll walk you through:
My MAP framework for difficult conversations.
A simple tool that replaces assumptions with information.
A practical three-part framework you can use straight away in the conversation you've been avoiding.
You can download it at jennymcoaching.com, or simply click this link https://jennymcoaching.com/conversation/
Or contact me directly - Email: jenny@jennymcoaching.com
Don't forget to listen to episode 87 and episode 88 to complete this trilogy.
Final Thought
This week, I want you to ask yourself one question:
What is one thing I might gain that I haven't allowed myself to imagine yet?
Because the gain isn't only what might happen on the other side of the conversation.
The gain is also who you become by having it.
Every time you say the true thing calmly, clearly and confidently, you practise believing that what you have to say matters. Every time you ask for what you need, you practise believing you deserve to ask for it.
Maybe you've spent long enough rehearsing everything that could go wrong.
What if, just this once, you gave yourself permission to imagine what could go right?
This episode was produced by www.keystepsupport.com
