In this episode, we’re tackling a heavy, complicated, and deeply divisive conversation: the Lindsey Clancy case and what it brings up about postpartum depression, postpartum psychosis, maternal mental health, and the ways our systems may be failing women. As two therapists, we unpack the difficulty of assessing someone’s mental state from the outside, the limits of psychiatric intervention, and why this case has become such a lightning rod online.
But because this is us, we also wander into a little potpourri—from Colette’s husband rupturing his bicep moving the world’s most expensive dust collector (aka her Peloton), to how defensiveness can derail a relationship in seconds, the darker side of social media and true crime culture, and, yes, Harry and Meghan. Underneath it all is a bigger question: Are we taking good enough care of one another? This is a raw conversation about guilt, mental health, motherhood, relationships, social media, and why we could all stand to give each other a little more grace.
Episode Highlights
[0:03] - Setting the stage for a sensitive conversation about the Lindsey Clancy case, women’s mental health, and everything else on our minds.
[2:07] - How Colette’s unused Peloton led to Steve’s major bicep injury—and an unexpected lesson in guilt and defensiveness.
[3:25] - Catching the urge to defend yourself before it turns a misunderstanding into an unnecessary argument.
[5:55] - Laura’s childhood story about an ill-advised swing-set game and the very human experience of feeling responsible when someone gets hurt.
[10:33] - Turning to the Lindsey Clancy trial and the heartbreaking questions surrounding postpartum depression, psychosis, criminal responsibility, and maternal mental health.
[13:59] - Why postpartum depression can be so difficult to recognize—even when someone has support and people know they’re struggling.
[18:54] - Murder-suicide, severe depression, and why determining someone’s mental state at a specific moment can be extraordinarily complicated.
[20:52] - Our own experiences with postpartum depression and anxiety—and how little anyone asked about our mental health after becoming mothers.
[22:05] - Why getting women appropriate mental health care isn’t as simple as telling someone to seek help or assuming hospitalization is always an option.
[25:04] - The isolation of new motherhood, intrusive thoughts, anxiety, and the pressure to look like everything is fine.
[27:27] - Discussing altruistic filicide, suicide, unbearable psychological suffering, and the disturbing rise of murder-suicide cases.
[29:02] - What other societies can teach us about community, healthcare, family support, and creating stronger safety nets.
[31:48] - The dark side of true crime culture and what happens when tragedy becomes content, clicks, and social media entertainment.
[35:21] - Why online pile-ons can become dangerous for someone who may already be struggling with their mental health.
[37:13] - A pivot to Harry and Meghan, public scrutiny, conflicting narratives, and whether multiple things can be true at the same time.
[43:07] - From the enormous to the everyday: everybody is dealing with something, whether we can see it or not.
[44:39] - Our takeaway for the week: give people grace, assume the best instead of the worst, and just be kind.
If today's discussion resonated with you or sparked curiosity, please rate, follow, and share Insights from the Couch with others. Your support helps us reach more people and continue providing valuable insights. Here’s to finding our purposes and living a life full of meaning and joy. Stay tuned for more!
Ever stayed quiet to keep the peace and felt yourself disappear? The Cost of Quiet is for anyone who avoids conflict and pays the price. Reclaim your voice, strengthen your relationships, and experience real peace. Order your copy and join the movement: https://www.colettejanefehr.com/new-book
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Order The Cost of Quiet now! Colette’s new book, The Cost of Quiet: How to Have the Hard Conversations that Create Secure, Lasting Love, launched February 3rd. Order your copy today: https://www.colettejanefehr.com/new-book
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Top 60 Couples Therapy Podcasts | Top 100 U.S. Mental Health Podcasts | Top 100 Relaxation Podcasts
