The Psychology of BORING SEX with Shashi Solluna: Expanding The Window of Pleasure

🔥 BORING SEX IS A WARNING SIGN

How to Expand Your Window of Pleasure

"I used to lie there wondering when it would be over."

That’s not a confession. That’s a call to awakening.

Most people think bad sex is a technique problem. It’s not. It’s a tolerance problem—your nervous system simply cannot hold that much pleasure yet.

In this episode of the Boundless Body Podcast, Dr. Brian Tierney sits down with Shashi Solluna—Oxford-trained psychologist turned international Tantra teacher—to reveal why boring sex is actually a spiritual signal, and how to systematically expand your capacity for embodied ecstasy.

• ✅ Why "just relax" is terrible advice for trauma survivors—and what to do instead
• ✅ The difference between goal-driven sex (exhausting) and nourishing yin sex (restorative)
• ✅ How a decade-long tantric partnership transformed Shashi from celibate seeker to pleasure teacher
• ✅ Why your pelvic floor holds the key to both trauma and transcendence
• ✅ The "pendulation" method: moving between contraction and expansion without dissociation
• ✅ How anger and grief are not obstacles to passion—they are its raw fuel
• ✅ A simple self-pleasure practice (perineum + breath) that rewires full-body orgasmic potential

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Sashi Solluna:

• B.A. in Experimental Psychology, Oxford University
• Trained in Osho active meditations (embodiment, catharsis, therapy)
• Certified in Mantak Chia’s Daoist sexual arts (including dark-room retreats)
• Lineage-holder in classical Indian tantra yoga
• Founder of LiveTantra.com – one of the world’s largest online Tantra platforms
• Author of Tantra Made Easy
• Coming soon: films Sex to Spirit + Tantra Unveiled

"You can't learn this out of a book. You have to feel it in your bones."

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The Circle of Light practice (erotic innocence reboot)

The Perineum + Breath Reset (from 55:43)

1. Place gentle awareness on the perineum (between genitals and anus)
2. Breathe softly into that space—no forcing
3. Allow micro-movements: a slight lift on the inhale, release on the exhale
4. Notice if pleasure arises, or numbness, or both. Stay curious.
5. Do this for 3 minutes alone, then bring into partnered touch.

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"Pleasure is a capacity, not a goal. You build it the same way you build a muscle—slowly, with repetition, and without shame."

• 🌐 Shashi’s platform: LiveTantra.com
• 📖 Book: Tantra Made Easy
• 🎬 Upcoming films: Sex to Spirit + Tantra Unveiled
• 🎧 Subscribe to Boundless Body Podcast

This episode contains mature conversations about sexuality, trauma, and the nervous system. Listener discretion is advised—and welcomed.

🎧 Listen now if you’ve ever wondered:
“Is this really all sex is supposed to feel like?”

Spoiler: It’s not.

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HASHTAGS

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