If you feel stuck in chronic pain recovery, this one is for you. Not the beginning part where you are figuring out what neuroplastic symptoms even are. The part where you have done the work, read the books, hired the coaches, and something still has not moved.
Doc Tovah has been a chiropractor for 41 years and has hosted the TMS Roundtable for seven, with over 500 broadcasts. She is 69. Her mother had MS starting when Doc Tovah was eleven, she grew up in a house she describes as chaotic, and she was diagnosed with Crohn's along the way. She talks about that diagnosis almost in passing, which is the whole point.
She names the pattern she sees in people who stay stuck, and it is not effort. It is disconnection. People who cannot tell you what they feel. People who say "I don't know" so often that it becomes a freeze response. People who feel okay around others and fall apart the second they are alone with themselves. That gap is the work.
We also get into the part almost nobody says out loud, which is that a victim stance can be doing a job for you. It protected me from being seen and rejected for years, and I did not know it was happening. Doc Tovah has been there too and she says it plainly. You are the problem and you are the solution, and that is the good news.
Then she gives the practice. Not a technique to add to your list. A relationship. Coffee with your fear. Going to sleep with your loneliness. Sitting with the feeling instead of building a story around it. She says fear can paralyze you or it can be fuel, and the difference is not how brave you are, it is whether you stop fighting reality long enough to be with it.
One more thing she said that I keep thinking about. Pain is not punishing you. It is protecting you. And most people who feel stuck are not far away from healing. They are standing right at the door.
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