In the first seven months of my relationship with Julia, I was jealous. Not hyper controlling, but a silent suffering that verged on obsessive compulsiveness. I was beginning and ending my days with anguish, rage, despair, blame, and frustration.
I share the full arc of that experience, what triggered it, what it revealed in me, why none of the tools I tried worked, and how Julia's extraordinary capacity for dignified connection, what I call the Roger Federer of relationship form, was so foreign to my pattern of closing off that it destabilized me.
I also share how the transformation happened, not through a specific practice, but through living in alignment and letting the distortion, like a wonky wheel, smooth itself out in the container of a committed relationship.
We close on what this journey has made possible: a genuine desire to connect with her ex, and a relationship that is a multiplier of her liberation and mine.
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