What if children's distress is not just a problem to solve, but a signal of their need to be seen? This article and podcast episode explore how children's expectations about availability and effectiveness of support from close others develop through repeated interactions with multiple caregivers. Using a psychological lens - in particular looking at attachment theory - we explore how educators and parents/carers can shape these expectations of care through their everyday responses to children's distress.
Read the article here:
https://thevoiceofearlychildhood.com/will-you-notice-me-what-children-learn-from-how-we-respond-to-their-distress/
This episode is in partnership with BookedIn
BookedIn is a CPD booking platform that connects organisations with verified speakers, trainers and consultants – so you can find the right fit faster, based on your brief, audience and outcomes.
You can discover, compare, and manage bookings in one place – designed to help you book with more clarity and confidence.
Whether you're booking CPD or are a speaker yourself, they're opening early access soon, and if you want to be first to hear when it's live, join the waiting list today!
To find out more and sign up to the wait list visit: https://waitlist.bookedin.online/
Listen to more:
If you enjoyed this episode, you might also like:
● An introduction to John Bolwby - https://thevoiceofearlychildhood.com/an-introduction-to-john-bowlby/
● An introduction to Mary Ainsworth - https://thevoiceofearlychildhood.com/an-introduction-to-mary-ainsworth/
● Unconditional positive regard in early childhood: What we can still learn from Carl Rogers and Mister Rogers? - https://thevoiceofearlychildhood.com/unconditional-positive-regard-in-early-childhood-what-we-can-still-learn-from-carl-rogers-and-mister-rogers/
● Understanding the impact of childhood trauma and how to develop trauma-informed practices - https://thevoiceofearlychildhood.com/understanding-the-impact-of-childhood-trauma-and-how-to-develop-trauma-informed-practices/
Get in touch and share your voice:
Do you have thoughts, questions or feedback? Get in touch here! – https://thevoiceofearlychildhood.com/contact/
Episode break down:
00:00 – Welcome and episode focus
02:05 – Understanding distress as communication
04:14 – Why children's distress can be misunderstood
05:55 – Can you notice me?
06:57 – Repeated interactions and attachment
10:08 – Secure base script knowledge
10:46 – How children learn whether support is available
12:30 – Scripts, shortcuts and everyday experiences
15:10 – What attuned responses look like in practice
16:45 – Opening the gates of learning
17:55 – Acknowledging distress
19:57 – Feeling seen before setting limits
20:13 – Acknowledging feelings, not validating behaviour
21:34 – Sensitive limit setting
21:50 – Multiple caregivers and attachment networks
22:12 – Moving beyond one primary attachment relationship
23:54 – The role of educators and professional caregivers
25:54 – A village of caregivers
26:24 – Patterns over perfection
26:41 – Good enough care
29:30 – Children need patterns, not perfect adults
29:54 – Current research and longitudinal findings
32:30 – Secure base script knowledge and later wellbeing
33:26 – Supporting parents and the network of care
35:08 – Reflecting on the long-term impact of early relationships
36:19 – Responding to distress over time
37:17 – Intergenerational patterns of care
37:36 – A key shift in mindset
37:47 – From fixing the problem to being there
38:57 – Closing reflections and thanks
For more episodes and articles visit The Voice of Early Childhood website: https://www.thevoiceofearlychildhood.com
