What does it actually take to build a family through surrogacy as a gay couple, from choosing an egg donor to navigating failed transfers, COVID era matching, and doing it all twice?
In this episode of the Building Your Family podcast, Lisa sits down with Alexander Paykin to talk through every stage of the surrogacy journey he and his husband Ricky took to become fathers of two children. This is one of the most honest and practical conversations about gay surrogacy you will find anywhere.
What you will learn in this episode:
How Alexander and Ricky got on the same page about timing when one was ready and one was not
How they chose their egg donor from a smaller pool and what made her feel like the right match
Why they were surprised to learn the surrogate matching process was completely separate from embryo creation
What COVID did to their timeline and how early interviews happened by phone and Zoom
The difference between their first surrogate Ashley who became like a sister and later surrogate experiences
Why repeated failed transfers and matching setbacks did not stop them
How family reactions changed once the babies arrived
If you are a gay couple considering surrogacy, or anyone navigating this path, Alexander's story will give you something real to hold onto.
Lisa Schuman LCSW is the founder of The Center for Family Building, author of Building Your Family: The Complete Guide to Donor Conception, and host of the Building Your Family podcast.
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