Your boss sends a two-word message, "Can we talk?", and before you've read it twice your brain has already decided: you're in trouble, you're about to be rewarded, or it's just a conversation. That split second is the whole game. In this episode, Ashish sits down with Due Quach, founder of Calm Clarity, author of Calm Clarity, and a refugee who went from inner-city Philadelphia to Harvard, Wharton and private equity, only to discover that outward success hadn't quieted the survival mode running inside her, which set her on the path to rewiring her own brain and teaching others to do the same.
Due explains why most of us, including the leaders making decisions for thousands of people, spend our days in survival mode or chasing the next reward without realizing it, and how to train the brain's default mode network so calm, clear thinking becomes your default rather than your exception. You'll learn the three settings of the brain, the body signals that tell you which one is running the show, why you should stop trying to clear your mind, and the simple rituals that turned one stressed finance team into a high-performing one.
What You Will Learn:
How the default mode network, the part of your brain that "never really rests," switches between Brain 1.0 (threat), Brain 2.0 (reward) and Brain 3.0 (the calm, wise Inner Sage), and why the one you practice becomes your default
Why the "Can we talk?" message produces three completely different stories, and the simple write-it-down exercise that lets you choose the most helpful one
How to stop overthinking without trying to clear your mind: watch your default mode network, name what it is doing, and talk back to it like an inner coach
The body signals that tell you which brain is in charge: contraction and clenching for Brain 1.0, rigidity and impatience for Brain 2.0
The four neural systems that make Brain 3.0 your default (attention, meta-awareness, resilience, connection) and three team rituals that turn it into a way of working
Episode Chapters:
00:00 A quick preview of the central idea: how love, connection, and self-awareness support flourishing and better leadership.
02:18 Due introduces the capacity to stay engaged with dysfunctional systems without letting them shape who you become.
10:49 The conversation breaks down the three brain states—survival, craving/reward, and the wiser, more regulated state.
22:19 A practical workplace example: how different brain states react when your boss sends a vague “Can we talk?” message.
27:48 Due explains the core capacities that strengthen the wiser state: attention, self-awareness, resilience, and connection.
39:41 A real-world story of a team using these practices to improve collaboration, navigate pressure, and lead more effectively.
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